


I've been waiting for a lifetime, for a moment just like this.

by pandabob



Series: The Family love built [2]
Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Christmas Fluff, Found Family, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-16
Updated: 2020-01-16
Packaged: 2021-02-24 15:40:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 25,022
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21820348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pandabob/pseuds/pandabob
Summary: It's Jeff's last Christmas hospital visit before he retires so Kent is determined to make sure that he visits everyone, little does he know that this visit will change their lives forever.Otherwise known as the backstory that no one asked for (except someone did)
Relationships: Kent "Parse" Parson/Jeff "Swoops" Troy
Series: The Family love built [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1572298
Comments: 58
Kudos: 92





	1. You caught my eye.

“You know this is the thing you’ll miss the most,” Kent grinned at Jeff as his head appeared through the neck of his jersey, “You love the kids more than you do the hockey and don’t pretend you don’t.” 

Jeff reached out his hand curling it into the front of Kent’s shirt and pulled him closer, kissing the smirk from his lips. “I’ll borrow a shirt and a snapback and sneak in next year; no one recognises me now so they’re not going to notice then are they?” 

“Everybody knows who you are Mr four Stanley cups, two Conn Smyths, five times all-star and all round awesome dude.”

“Most people nowadays,” Jeff pulled Kent against his chest, wrapped his arms tightly around his back and kissed his forehead before laughing, “Know me more as husband of Kent Parson than they do for the cups but it’s nice you remember.”

“Yeah sorry,” Kent tipped his head back and smirked up at Jeff, “I should have added that to the list, four times Stanley cup champion, two Conn Smyths, five times all-star and the best fuck award winner every week for the last four hundred and ten weeks.”

“Four hundred and ten weeks?” Jeff asked

“I think that’s right, maths on the fly isn’t my strong point but I think it was early season the year after the second cup wasn’t it?” Kent could feel himself blushing as Jeff’s eyes widened with a cheeky smile.

“That was the first time yeah, not sure you should credit me for the sixteen weeks and four days after that when we didn’t dare be in a room alone together and pretended we weren’t both more than eager to do it again.”

“I don’t know,” Kent pushed even closer into Jeff’s body and leaned in to bite gently at the side of his neck, the spot that made Jeff’s knees buckle every time he did it, “It’s not like you weren’t involved in me getting off in that time.”

“Geez,” Jeff pushed Kent away and shook his head, eyes wide and face flushed, “You can’t go saying things like that when we’ve got things to do before I can take you home.”

“If I said you could take me home now,” Kent turned around to pick up his hat from the chair behind him, “You’d say no because this is more important and therefore prove my point.” He pushed the hat onto his head and gestured towards the door “So let’s go do your last Christmas hospital visit as an Ace and see if you can get through it without crying.”

The visit was scheduled to last an hour and in that time Kent had shaken a dozen dad’s hands (and cuddled one), hugged ten mums, given presents to fifteen children who smiled at him and thanked him more than he thought they should given that all he was doing was handing out IPads and Aces blankets while they were fighting for their lives against one dreadful illness or another and doing it all with a smile, and, with the help of Jeff, who stuck close and held wires and monitors that Kent was sure he was going to dislodge, he’d held a tiny baby boy who was so sick that his parents weren’t sure that they would ever take more than the photograph home.

An hour after their visit should have ended Kent and Jeff had talked to, cuddled, signed and taken photographs for another ten families, and they’d promised to drop off the extra presents tomorrow because they’d run out of things before they’d run out of time, and they were almost ready to go until Kent spotted a nurse coming out of a room that they’d not visited and he nodded his intention to Jeff and then, leaving Jeff to finish up with Aces PR, he jogged down the corridor towards the nurse.

“Hey,” Kent stopped beside her and she started slightly before she relaxed and smiled at him.

“Mr Parson, you still here? I thought you’d finished hours ago.”

“We didn’t want to leave before we’d seen everyone,” he tipped his head in the direction of Jeff and smiled, “It’s his last year, he’s retiring come the summer, I’ve got to make sure he gets to see everyone.”

“That’s kind of you; it’s always a highlight for the children when the Aces visit.”

“It’s a highlight for us too!” Kent laughed and then settled a little more seriously, “Have we missed someone in that room?” He waved his hand towards the door that she’d just come out of. “We haven’t been in there but you’ve been in and out. “We don’t want to accidentally miss someone, that would be rubbish.”

“It’s, there’s, erm.” She stumbled over her words and Kent reached out and touched her arm gently.

“It’s ok, I’m sorry.” Kent was worried now, he hadn’t meant to cause upset and something didn’t feel right about this conversation. “I know confidentiality’s important, I just didn’t want to neglect anyone you know.”

She coughed a half sob and Kent stepped closer and put an arm around her shoulder, standing still and saying nothing until she straightened up and wiped her eyes. “Do you have time to wait for me to make a phone call?”

“Yeah,” Kent nodded, “I’ll get rid of the crew and we’ll wait over there?” He looked towards the chairs next to where Jeff was standing and she nodded before turning away and disappearing down the corridor.

“Thanks for doing the pictures guys,” Kent smiled widely at the PR crew and hoped Jeff wouldn’t ask about the clear fakeness of it until the crew had gone, “We’re done now, sorry for keeping you longer than planned, you know how it is.”

The PR guys laughed and nodded, “we know when we get sent with you two that it’ll never go to time,” Sarah the PR manager laughed, “I’d tell you we always factor in extra time but then you’d know our secret.” She grinned and Jeff and Kent both laughed.

“It’s a secret we’ve known for a while,” Jeff laughed, “we’ll keep pretending we don’t though.”

“Good good,” Sarah said with seriousness and then she winked and grinned, picked up her bag and led the crew out of the building.

“Talk.” Jeff said in a forceful whisper once they were alone.

“Not sure what to say,” Kent whispered back and pulled Jeff towards the seats. “They’re someone in that room down there,” he pointed towards the door he meant, “I asked if we’d missed someone and the nurse cried, she’s gone to make a phone call and we’re waiting here.”

“Ok,” Jeff settled his arm around Kent’s shoulder and pulled him into his side rubbing slowly at his shoulder, “We’ll wait right here until she comes back then.”

“Mr Parson,” the nurse walked towards them with a tentative smile and Kent jumped to his feet dragging Jeff up with him. “I’ve spoken to child protective services.” Kent felt Jeff’s arm tighten around his shoulder, “and they’ve agreed that it would be ok for you to say hello to the children in the room you were asking about.”

Kent smiled, casting a glance up at Jeff who was smiling despite his teary eyes.

“I had to check because there are no parents with them to give permission and they might not want to speak to you but their case worker said you could try.”

“Okay,” Kent and Jeff agreed and they followed the nurse down the corridor to the room where she knocked gently and pushed the door open.

“Sammy,” the nurse spoke gently as she walked into the room, “Sammy sweetheart can I bring two people in to meet you and Johnny? They just want to say hello.”

Kent listened hard for a reply but didn’t hear one.

“I promise they just want to say hi, I think you might recognise one of them. They’ll leave as soon as you want them too, I promise.”

Kent listened again and felt his heart jump into his throat when he heard a mumbled “okay” and the nurse moved her arm from where she was blocking the door and stepped out of the way to let them in.

There were two beds in the room, one made up with cot sides, a small television playing in the corner and two seats under the window a few feet from either bed so they made their way towards the chairs and sat down, trying to make themselves as small as possible given their excessive hockey player size.

“Hello,” a little voice came from the cot and Jeff looked in that direction and spoke gently.

“Hello to you too sweetheart, thank you for letting us come and say hi.”

“I’m Sammy.” Came the response as a little girls sat up in the cot and looked at them, “This is Johnny,” she pointed to the bed next to her, “He’s my brother.”

“Are you looking after him Sammy?” The gentleness of Jeff’s voice when he spoke to children always made Kent’s heart swell to twice the size but right at that moment he was sure his chest was going to burst with it.

“Yes” she almost smiled, “I look after him because mummy’s sick.” 

Kent gulped, his breath sticking in his throat but Jeff didn’t miss a beat, “What a lucky boy he is to have a big sister like you.”

Jeff smiled at her and Sammy almost smiled back, her eyes still too sad.

“This it Kent,” Jeff pointed to Kent and he gave Sammy a tiny wave, “we came to the hospital today to meet all the wonderful big sisters and little brothers who were here and to say Merry Christmas to everyone.” Sammy nodded at him. “Thank you for saying we could come and meet you.”

“You’re Swoops.” Sammy suddenly sat up straighter her eyes lighting up, “you play hockey, my dad loved you. Johnny look” She looked down at the bed beside her “Swoops is in your room.” 

Kent noted the past tense and squeezed hard at Jeff’s hand, Jeff squeezed back.

“Can I come closer and say hello to Johnny?” Jeff asked carefully, “Kent would like to say hello too if that’s ok?”

“Johnny, Johnny its Swoops,” Sammy was almost bouncing on the bed and they could hear a small laugh coming from next to her so Jeff stood up, pulling Kent with him, and moved slowly towards the bed.

“Hey,” Jeff smiled and spoke quietly as he looked down into the cot seeing a young boy, curled into his sister’s side and looking back at him and Kent leant in closer and smiled at the children.

“Your dad liked Swoops did he?” Kent grinned when Sammy nodded at him, “He is pretty awesome,” Kent winked. 

“You play too?” Sammy asked quietly as Johnny wriggled next to her and made a sound that neither Jeff or Kent could interpret but it didn’t sound happy

“You comfortable sweetheart?” Kent reached out and stroked the back on Johnny’s hand gently with his thumb causing him to uncurl his fist, turn his hand over and grasp at Kent’s finger, while Sammy cradled Johnny’s cheek with one hand and wrapped the other around his middle almost, but not quite, pulling him away from Kent.

“He’s not going to take him Sammy,” Jeff moved around the bed until he was on Sammy’s side, “Kent just likes to make people feel better if he can and Johnny sounded sad.”

Kent saw Sammy relax just slightly as she listened to Jeff and her grip on Johnny relaxed just a little although she was still watching him carefully.

“Do you look after Johnny Sammy?” Jeff crouched down at the side of the bed next to Sammy, making himself smaller than her.

Sammy nodded and smiled proudly, “Mummy ill when daddy gone so I looked after him. I make bottles and change nappies and everything.”

“Aren’t you clever?” Kent smiled at Sammy and she ducked her head into her shoulders, playing shy. “Where’s mummy now?”

The nurse coughed loudly behind him and Kent opened his mouth to withdraw the question but before he could Sammy answered. “I couldn’t wake her up when I ran out of powder for Johnny’s bottles. The man in the shop couldn’t wake her either so we had to come here.”

“Wow,” Kent swallowed hard and blinked twice as he lifted the hand Johnny wasn’t chewing on towards Sammy, “High five for being so clever as to go for help Sammy, that’s the bravest and most amazing thing I’ve ever heard.”

“He’s right Sammy,” Jeff spoke as Sammy slapped Kent’s hand and he raised his fist for a bump, “Johnny is so lucky to have you looking after him.”

“He’s my brother,” Sammy said with pride, “I love him.” Johnny coughed and started to cry and Sammy pulled at his arms trying to move him into her lap. “He’s getting too big for me to cuddle when he cries though.”

Kent’s heart, which had been breaking into pieces ever since they walked into the room, cracked completely down the middle and tears ran from his eyes as he watched her struggle.

“Can I help Sammy?” Jeff stood up and moved closer to the cot, reaching slightly towards Johnny while watching Sammy and, Kent was sure, waiting for her permission to touch him.

Sammy nodded sadly and tried to move out of the way, clearly expecting Jeff to pick Johnny up and take him away but instead he put his hands gently on her arms and helped her move around until she could lean back against his body and then he scooped Johnny up and sat him in Sammy lap, wrapping his arms around them both, supporting Johnny’s weight as Sammy held him close and began to sing quietly to him.

From the other side of the bed Kent watched Jeff as he held both children safe in his arms in a way Kent was somehow sure neither of them had experienced in a long time and he wondered where these little people would end up now that they apparently had no one.

-+-

“I think he needs his diaper changing,” Sammy whispered only just loud enough for Jeff to hear, “And needs milk.”

“Is that why your beautiful singing isn’t stopping him crying?” Jeff whispered back and Sammy nodded while tightening her arms around her brother.

“They’ll take him away,” her words broke into a sob and Kent felt the tears in his own eyes as he saw one roll down Jeff’s cheek.

“I can,” the nurse who was still standing in the doorway of the room spoke almost nervously and startled everyone, “maybe, erm.”

Kent turned and looked at her, smiling the best he could, “Could you?”

“Yeah,” she nodded “I’ll go get some diapers and some milk and how about I get something for you too Sammy? What’s your favourite?”

“I can do it?” Sammy asked with an edge of excitement in her voice but Kent saw the look on the nurse’s face and knew that she was about to say no so he quickly replied. “You don’t really know how to do that do you?” and Sammy set off on an enthusiastic explanation of exactly how she took care of Johnny while the nurse left the room.

Sammy was still talking when the nurse came back, explaining how she put a mat on the floor under her brother when she changed his diaper and a cushion under his head to prop him up while he had his bottles and Kent was lost in listening to her. There was no doubt that these beautiful children had not had the life that they should have had so far but the pride in Sammy’s eyes at all she’d done for her brother made his heart swell in his chest.

“Can I take him?” The nurse reached out her hands to take Johnny from Sammy’s lap and she flinched, pushing back into Jeff so he tightened his arms around them both, holding them close against his chest.

“Do you know something Sammy? Kent has never changed a diaper?” Jeff smiled up at Kent as he said it and they both laughed at the look of shock on Sammy’s face. “He’s an only child and never had a little brother to look after.”

“Really?” Sammy turned her head and looked up at Jeff with horror on her face.

“Really,” Jeff nodded, “so do you think you could teach him how to do it?” Sammy tensed in his arms, “He won’t take him anywhere other than the table over there,” he gestured at the changing table in the corner, “and I’ll lift you up so you can keep an eye on him and tell him what to do.”

“Can I not just show him?”

“How will he learn if he doesn’t practice?” 

Jeff was trying to joke and to encourage Sammy to let go of her brother but Kent could hear the desperation in his voice as they both knew that the nurse wasn’t going to let Sammy do it.

“Okay,” Sammy nodded nervously and then looked at Kent, releasing her grip slightly on her brother and Kent took the opportunity to lean in and pick Johnny up, cuddling him close to his chest and trying not to show any of the things he was feeling on his face.

“Come on then missy,” Jeff let go of Sammy as she knelt up and turned to face him, lifting her arms tentatively towards him, and then he picked her up onto his hip and she cuddled close under his chin fisting her hands into his shirt and, after a long moment, relaxed her full body weight against him, letting out a sigh.

By the time they went home, five hours after the PR team had left; Kent had changed two diapers under Sammy’s watchful eye. Jeff had helped Sammy give Johnny two bottles, holding her and Johnny while she did it. Sammy had eaten some macaroni cheese and drunk a bottle of chocolate milk that Kent was fairly sure had more added nutrients in it than the postgame shakes he and Jeff lived on during the playoffs and Kent and Jeff had sat for two hours, each cuddling a sleeping child, and chatted quietly to each other and then to the children’s case worker, Natalie, who seemed as heartbroken as anyone about the situation the children were in.

“You ok?” Kent sat down next to Jeff on the sofa and pulled him into a hug.

“No.” he said simply and curled his legs up onto the sofa, settling down so that his head was in Kent’s lap and Kent could run his fingers through his hair.

“It’s ok baby,” Kent’s fingers played gently against Jeff’s scalp, “It’s been a tough day.”

They sat for a long time, Jeff relaxing more and more until Kent was almost sure that he was asleep but then he spoke quietly, “thanks for letting me stay all day, I know we had plans.”

“The only plan I had was to spend time with you and you have never looked cuter or more amazing than you did when you found a way to help Sammy cuddle Johnny, you just seemed to know what to do and that, that beautiful heart of yours, is what I love about you.”

“Can we go see them again when we drop the rest of the presents off tomorrow? Natalie said they’d be there for a week at least.”

“I was hoping you’d say that.” Kent bent down and kissed Jeff’s temple. “Straight after skate?”

“Straight after skate.” Jeff agreed.


	2. I was hypnotised.

They arrived at the hospital just before lunch time, bags of presents in their hands and backpacks on their backs, and made their way to the nurses’ station.

“We brought these.” Kent put the bag he was carrying on the desk and smiled at the man behind it, “We ran out yesterday, can’t have the kids not getting their presents can we?”

“Most of the kids were just happy to meet you but I’m sure they’ll not say no.” The man laughed and lifted the bag down on his side as Jeff handed him the two, lighter but bigger, bags he was carrying.”

“Aces blankets.” He said in explanation at the confused look he received “The same as we brought yesterday.”

“Thank you,” the nurse smiled, “the kids were happy you stayed so long yesterday, I honestly don’t think they expected you to actually bring in the presents today.”

“We couldn’t disappoint them,” Kent laughed, “We also thought we might get the chance to see Sammy and Johnny again? If we could.”

The smile slipped from the nurse’s face as his eyes flicked to the hospital room the children had been in yesterday, “I’m not sure that’ll be possible.”

Kent’s heart leapt into his throat and Jeff’s whole posture stiffened next to him.

“Why not,” Jeff ground out, working hard to control all the emotions that Kent could hear in his voice.

“They had a rough night,” the nurse came around to their side of the desk, “Their caseworker is in there trying to settle them down, I’m not sure she’d like to be disturbed but I’ll ask if you like.”

“Please?” Kent stepped closer to Jeff, leaning into him just slightly and trying to calm him while not overstepping their agreed in public behaviour bounds. “We’d really like to see them.”

Following close behind the nurse Kent and Jeff came to a stop a few feet from the door as the nurse pushed it open and the sound of shouting and crying flooded the corridor. 

Jeff reached for Kent’s hand and grasped it tightly for just a second, his whole body trembling, and Kent stepped closer, whispering gently and trying to calm him while feeling anything but calm himself.

The door swung closed again cutting off the noise and they both stood looking at it waiting for it to open again.

“Mr Parson, Mr Troy,” Natalie came through the door, cheeks red and damp with tears, and looked at them like she couldn’t be more pleased to see them, “can you stay?”

“Are we allowed?”

“Only if you can stay a while,” she sounded almost desperate, “if you’ve only got ten minutes then no, that would only make it worse.”

“No commitments until morning skate,” Jeff replied quickly, “what’s going on?”

Natalie’s shoulders relaxed a little, her eyes dropping to the floor, and she stepped closer, speaking quietly. “Apparently Johnny woke up at about six thirty and the night shift nurse gave him a bottle and changed his nappy but then instead of putting him back down with Sammy she put him in the other bed and pulled the cot sides up so when Sammy woke up Johnny had disappeared and then she saw him in the cot but couldn’t get to him. The hospital rang me at about ten to say she’d been screaming for an hour and I’ve been here close to two hours and she’s still crying. The staff won’t let her near Johnny until she’s calmed down in case she hurts him and she won’t calm down because she can’t get to him and Johnny’s crying because she’s upset. They’re both exhausted. She’s shouted for her mum and dad on and off but mixed in with that,” Natalie looked up, making eye contact with Jeff, “She’s been shouting for you.”

Kent was shocked but Jeff just nodded, “So can we see them?”

Natalie nodded.

“Anything we can’t do?” Kent asked as he unzipped the top of the backpack Jeff was carrying, pulled out a rolled up blanket and shook it out before throwing it over his shoulder.

“Like what?” She asked, seemingly a bit taken aback.

“Are we allowed to touch? To pick them up? To move them around?” Kent asked quickly.

“What he means,” Jeff interrupted, “is can we go in there and try and make things better for the kids or are you expecting us just to stand and watch?”

“You can do whatever you can think of, anything at all.”

“Okay,” Jeff nodded, looked at Kent to check his agreement and then they followed Natalie into the room.

“Sammy sweetie,” Jeff spoke calmly but louder than normal to try and break through the screaming as his eyes scanned around the room before he made eye contact with Kent, pointed to an empty corner of the room, and then strode confidently towards Sammy’s bed as Kent made his way to Johnny’s. “I’m going to pick you up baby girl,” 

Sammy didn’t seem to hear him and startled when he put his hand on her back.

“It’s ok angel, it’s only me.”

“Johnny, Johnny, Johnny” she gasped over and over again.

“Look look,” Jeff kept his hand solid against her back and pressed on her cheek to get her to turn her head towards where Kent was now holding a crying Johnny in his arms, “Kent’s got Johnny and I’ve got you ok?”

“Johnny, I want Johnny!”

“I know sweetheart,” he slipped his arm around her back, the other under her knees and lifted her up, holding her close despite her struggling, “he’s coming to you baby, I promise.” He walked across the room and sat down on the floor about a foot away from the corner, back leaning against one wall, and sat Sammy on his knee, still screaming and kicking her feet. “I need you to calm down for me Sammy, you need to be calm before Johnny can join us, I know you don’t want him getting hurt so we have to be gentle with him and gentle means calm sweetie.” Jeff spoke calmly and gently, rubbing slowly at her arms as she began to settle.

Kent watched as Sammy snuggled closer to Jeff, trying to relax and calm herself, and after a long few moments Jeff looked up at him and nodded and Kent slipped into the gap against the other wall, sitting himself down and leaning his back on the wall, his legs straight out under Jeff’s bent knees and he reached around Sammy to sit Johnny on her knee, the weight of him resting on Jeff’s chest before he wrapped his arms around Sammy to encourage her to rest back against him as he threw the blanket from his shoulder over the four of them and they cuddled up close enough that Kent could reach for Jeff’s hand with the arm not cuddling Sammy and hold on tight.

-+-

They’d been sat cuddled up together for about ten minutes, Sammy calm and relaxed but Johnny still crying a little, when a nurse approached them and Jeff raised his hand, waving her off in just the same way that Kent had seen him do to the linesman who’d tried to break up the fight he’d been having last week when he’d decided that he hadn’t quite finished making his point to the idiot who though growling ‘basketball’ at their rookie while digging for a puck was the way to play Hockey, and the nurse stepped back again.

“Sammy sweetheart,” Jeff spoke quietly and Sammy looked up at him with tired eyes, “do you have any idea what might be wrong with Johnny?”

“He’s hungry,” she whispered quietly and Kent hugged her tighter.

“Do you think so? What shall we do about that?” Kent whispered against her head, “Should we ask the nurse for a bottle for him?” Sammy nodded against his chest, “And some chocolate milk for you?” She nodded again and Kent looked up at the nurse who nodded and disappeared out of the door.

“Can I feed Johnny?” Jeff put his hand on Sammy’s leg as he asked her, hoping to reassure her if she panicked, “I know you’re really good at it but I’d really like to practice.”

After a long moment of thought Sammy gave a jerky nod and moved her hands from where they were holding on to her brother, allowing Jeff to reposition him so that he was lying properly in his arms just as the nurse reappeared with a bottle for Johnny and a carton with a spout for Sammy. Jeff took Johnny’s bottle from the nurse and Kent took Sammy’s, placing it in her hands once she’d finished wriggling and curled up against his chest, almost mirroring Johnny’s position.

“Here you go baby boy,” Jeff talked to Johnny, looking him in the eye and smiling at him as he slipped the bottle into his mouth and Johnny smiled back before setting about devouring his milk.

Kent noticed Natalie pulling a notebook from her bag and quickly writing something in it before his focus was drawn back to Jeff and the way his heart beat watching him so comfortable with a child in his arms.

“Do you think Sammy’s milk is as nice as yours?” Jeff asked Johnny and Kent noticed that she hadn’t yet put the carton to her mouth. “Your big sister must be hungry as well don’t you think baby boy?”

Sammy curled in closer, hiding her head under Kent’s chin. “I wonder,” Kent said quietly, “if your big sister would like me to help her with her milk, what do you think Johnny?” He moved his hand slowly, hoping not to startle her, until he could lift the carton from her hands and as he did so Sammy tipped her head back against his arm and looked up at him with both hope and sadness in her eyes, a tiny tear escaping down her cheek.

“You are a very special little girl,” Kent smiled gently as he made eye contact with her, “You’ve done the most amazing thing in looking after your little brother, he’s so very lucky to have you.” Kent lifted the carton to her mouth and Sammy allowed him to put the spout in her mouth, swallowing the milk down without looking away from his eyes. “Sometimes though, even the biggest, bestest girls need someone to look after them for a while.”

Johnny was asleep before he’d completely finished his bottle and Sammy’s eyes closed as soon as Kent took the now empty carton away from her lips, nuzzling her face against his chest and fisting her hand into his shirt as if trying to make sure that he didn’t disappear in her sleep. “It’s ok baby girl,” Kent whispered, leaning down to kiss her gently on the forehead, “I’m not going anywhere, you sleep safe.”

-+-

“Thank you,” Natalie said into the silence that had sat around them for the last ten minutes as they all tried not to disturb the children before they were properly asleep, “I don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t turned up when you did.”

“You’d have done the best you could,” Jeff replied, his voice as soft and reassuring as when he was talking to children. “Can you pass my bag,” Jeff waved his hand in the direction of the backpack he’d dropped by the door when they first came in.

Natalie quickly retrieved the bag, putting it down next to Jeff’s free hand and then she returned to her chair as Jeff unfastened the front pocket and pulled out two plastic boxes, one which he handed to Kent, and the other he set on the floor next to his thigh and snapped open the lid as he smirked up at Natalie. “I’m not saying we really wanted to come and see these two,” he tipped his head towards the sleeping children, “but we got our post skate meal as takeout.”

“You must be starving.” She said with shock in her voice and then her face dropped and she covered her mouth with her hands. “Obviously not actually starving,” she said more quietly, “sorry, I’m off my game right now, this case” She shook her head and rolled her eyes at herself, “These children are like nothing I’ve seen before, neglected children don’t smile and laugh like they do, they don’t look at you when you speak and smile back at you , they don’t react to their names or snuggle close when you call them baby or sweetheart or other pet names we all use and neglected babies don’t initiate eye contact when someone feeds them like Johnny did when you gave him his bottle and like Sammy did when you encouraged her to let you look after her. They don’t expect interaction so they don’t look for it but Johnny does, he reacts to it and initiates it all the time and that’s because Sammy gives him it, every time she does anything with him.” 

Natalie paused, breathing deeply and visibly swallowing hard, but her voice still wavered when she spoke again, “He might be almost one and still lying around like a newborn, he might not be eating food and just living on milk, he might sleep at odd times and he might be physically delayed in a hundred different ways but that boy is happy, clean and loved and that’s all down to a little girl who seems so much older than four but who, because she’s only four, has no say I what happens now.”

Kent could feel the tears running down his cheeks just as he could see them on Natalie’s and Jeff’s and he didn’t resist the urge to lean down and kiss Sammy’s head, tightening his arms around her.

“They won’t let her stay in hospital once she’s eating properly and Johnny will take longer to recover than that and I have no idea how either of them will cope with that. It’s going to break both their hearts but there’s nothing I can do about it.”

The reality of the situation landed hard and heavy in Kent’s chest, the children were in the care of the state and, given the hellish nightmare of the health care system they lived in, they would receive only the help the state deemed totally necessary. Their futures would be determined by the size of the budget allowed not the very best help they could find.

“We’ll pay,” Kent and Jeff spoke at the same moment, taking each other by surprise but after a quick exchange of glances they made the statement again, this time with more confidence. “We’ll pay for everything.”

“The medical bills for both,” Jeff continued, “so they stay together until they’re both ready to leave.”

“And for specialists, physios and psychologists and nutritionists and speech people and anything they need. All of it, we’ll pay for it.”

“You can’t do that,” Natalie looked at them in shock, “You can’t just agree to pay for something when you don’t know how much it’s going to cost.”

“Why not?” Kent asked, “We give money away every day to people we don’t know for things we never know the outcome of, why can’t we pay for things for people we care about?”

“Are you serious?” She looked back and forth between them.

“Yes,” they replied almost in unison and with a smile growing on her face she excused herself to make the necessary calls.

-+-

“When we’re dealing with Maskov we need to use your speed,” Coach was pointing at the video screen and talking but Kent was just staring into space so Jeff elbowed him hard in the side.

“Ow!” 

“When you two have finished fighting,” Coach laughed, “Any chance you’ll actually listen to me?”

“Sorry coach, yeah,” Kent adjusted himself in his seat, leaning forward, elbows on his knees and chin resting on his hands. “I’m listening now.” He smirked at his boss and got a roll of the eyes and a shake of the head in response before he went back to dissecting their powerplay ready for tonight.

“I’m just going to,” Kent waved his phone in Jeff’s direction and Jeff nodded as he followed the team out of the video room towards the locker room to get ready for morning skate.

When Kent arrived in the locker room he tapped Jeff on the back and kissed his cheek with a smile and then raced to get his gear on, making it out onto the ice before most of the team.

“You seem more focused now Parse,” Coach came to a stop next to Kent where he was practicing his slapshot. “Everything ok?”

“Yeah,” Kent hit the puck again, shaking his head at the loud ting as it hit the pipes, “Sorry about earlier.”

“No need for sorry, you knew what I was talking about and you’ll be ready for tonight, you always are. Just as long as you’re ok?”

“I’m fine coach,” he crashed a shot into the top corner of the net, “just needed to check on someone, I should have done it before tape.”

“Okay then.” Coach nodded still not looking too sure, “Let’s get skate done then you can sort things out before the game yeah?”

“Yeah,” Kent smashed another shot top shelf and then they turned and skated to centre ice ready for rushes.

-+-

“Will you feed me?” Sammy asked quietly as Jeff handed her the carton of strawberry milk the nurse had brought for lunch, “While Kent helps Johnny?”

“Of course I will sweetheart,” Jeff smiled and winked as he picked her up off the bed and sat down in the chair next to Kent, settling her on his lap, “You haven’t to go to sleep though remember.” 

Sammy nodded, “I remember the lady’s coming to see me, you won’t leave?”

“No,” Jeff and Kent spoke at the same time, “we’re not going anywhere until after nap and dinner, we have to go play hockey later though and if we’re late I might be in trouble like I was this morning.” Kent laughed, “I was so eager to check on you two that I forgot to listen to my boss!”

Sammy giggled at Kent and Jeff tickled her side, “He really got told off you know so I was wondering something.” Jeff rearranged their position so that Sammy could lie back against his arm and he moved the carton to her mouth as Johnny set about his bottle with great enthusiasm. “I wondered how you would feel about us calling in to see you in the morning on our way to skate? We could only stay for twenty minutes which we worry might upset you when we leave. What do you think?”

The milk had all been drunk and Johnny was up on Kent’s shoulder, Kent rubbing his back as he made effort to lift his head up, before Sammy finally replied. “Would you have breakfast with us?”

“Yeah,” Jeff nodded, “As long as you promise to eat,” Sammy dropped her eyes from Jeff’s and snuggled into his chest, “we need you to get fit and strong sweetheart.”

“Okay” Sammy said into his shirt.

“On which note,” Kent reached for his bag and pulled a huge box of salad out of the top followed by another box full of mixed fruit. “We need your help with our post skate snack; no way can the two of us eat all this!” Kent waggled his eyebrows at Sammy until she smiled and then he clicked open the lid and offered her first pick.

The very expensive and extremely calm paediatric specialist arrived as soon as they’d finished eating and she spent over an hour talking to Sammy and watching her play with Johnny, all overseen by Natalie, and, with Sammy’s permission, watching as Jeff and Kent helped Johnny try and move in ways Sammy was too small to help him with and then she disappeared out of the door with a list of times and days that Kent and Jeff would be around just as Johnny started to yawn and Sammy lost interest in answering questions 

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone work so hard Sammy,” Kent winked and grinned at her as she threw herself backwards on to the floor like a starfish next to where Johnny was lying and let out a loud yawn. “I really think we all deserve a snack before we put you down for your nap and I take this big lump,” Kent wrapped his arm around Jeff’s waist and pulled his into a hug, “home for his pre-game nap because we have a game to play tonight.”

“Daddy went once,” Sammy said with a smile as she stood up and raised her arms to Jeff, “Brought a thing home for me.” As he picked her up to his hip she made a shape with her fingers, “a black circle thing. It’s in my bedroom; I looked after it for him when he didn’t come back.”

“You mean a puck.” 

Sammy nodded, almost bouncing in his arms, “a puck, that’s what he called it. Said it was special because Swoops hit it too him. I’ll get it and show you when I go home.”

Kent felt a wave of horror flow through him, how was someone going to explain to this little girl that she couldn’t go home without breaking her heart? And what were they going to do with all her things and, given that questions were all over him right now, what on earth had happened to her dad?

“Hey beautiful boy,” Kent knelt down on the floor and, with his thumbs tucked under Johnny’s armpits, fingers supporting his head and back, he did as the specialist had advised and moved Johnny into a sitting position, sticking his tongue out at him and grinning until Johnny tried to mimic him at which point he wagged his tongue around making Johnny giggle. 

“Let’s go and see the nurse,” Jeff, still holding Sammy on his hip, turned towards the door and she turned her head around keeping her eye on Johnny, “we’ll ask her for afternoon snack for you and your very clever little brother and then we’ll come right back ok?”

Looking past Johnny towards Jeff Kent could see the tension in Sammy’s body increasing as they got closer to the door, her head craning to see her brother over Jeff’s shoulder and her fingers tightening in his shirt but Jeff stayed relaxed, speaking calmly and holding her tight and safe against him.

“Kent will look after Johnny for a few seconds while we go and place his order ok?”

Sammy didn’t move, she didn’t nod and agree but she didn’t start to fight either so Jeff kept walking towards the door while Kent returned his focus to Johnny who was dribbling all down his chin as the tip of his tongue pushed out through his lips again and again.

“I got you milk,” Sammy returned less than two minutes later, a baby bottle in one hand and a carton of milkshake in the other, and Johnny turned his head towards her voice and made a noise which sounded like excitement. “Yes Johnny, I went and got it.” Sammy said with pride and happiness in her voice.

“Well little man,” Kent picked Johnny up from the floor and moved to sit in the chair next to the bed, “We’d better drink this wonderful bottle your big sister got you then you can go to sleep with a full tummy.” 

Johnny smiled and waved his arms and Sammy laughed, leaning out of Jeff’s arms to hand Kent the bottle before snuggling back against his chest and whispering. “Will you help me with mine?”

Without responding Jeff twisted her around in his arms until she was lying just like Johnny was and sat down next to Kent cuddling her close, taking the carton from her hand and lifting it to her mouth.

“Remember what we told you before?” Jeff asked quietly, maintaining eye contact with Sammy who nodded just a little, “We won’t be here after your nap because we have to go home and nap ourselves before we go play hockey,” he grinned and Sammy smiled around the straw in her mouth her eyes closing, heavy with sleep. “We’ll come see you in the morning for breakfast and then we’ll come back again after skate ok?” Sammy nodded again and finished the last of the milk.

Johnny was asleep in Kent’s arms, only a few mouthfuls of milk left in his bottle, as Sammy drank the last few drops of hers and then yawned widely, an act that was quickly mirrored by Jeff. “Come on,” Kent stood up carefully, trying not to wake Johnny, “Let’s get you two tucked in so I can take this big tired baby home to bed.”

Kent winked at Sammy and she laughed before leaning up to kiss Jeff’s cheek. “Sleep well,” she whispered as she moved away and Jeff tried to control the sudden tears in his eyes and lump in his throat as he replied, “you too sweetheart.”

“Bring a puck?” Sammy whispered to Kent as he leaned in to wipe her hair from her forehead as she snuggled close to Johnny and Kent nodded, kissed her cheek and then grabbed Jeff’s hand like it was a lifeline as they left the room.


	3. You pulled me in,

“Did we miss a milestone?” Coach asked shiftily as he cornered Kent by the tape trolley.

“No coach, nothing like that.” He responded without looking away from the puck that he was wrapping tape around the edge of.

“So what you doing?”

“I promised a beautiful lady a puck,” he waved his hands at the black disk on the bench, the date now written on the tape and his and Jeff’s signatures in gold pen on the face of it as if this all made perfect sense and coach scowled a little.

“A lady your husband knows about I’m guessing from the fact he’s signed it?”

“Oh god yes!” Kent turned suddenly, looking wide-eyed at coach, “A beautiful lady as in a little girl, don’t worry there’s no scandal here,” he smirked, “We didn’t put the organisation through the whole coming out and wedding thing just to chuck it back in your faces.”

“You didn’t ‘put us through’ anything Parse,” Coach smiled and slapped him on the shoulder as he turned to walk away, “good to know my hat-trick scoring couple aren’t splitting up on me though.”

Kent finished writing the match details on the puck and slipped it into his jacket pocket just as Jeff appeared, a bag over each shoulder and a wide grin on his face. “The guys want us to go out for dinner, I told them we couldn’t as we had to be up early, hope you don’t mind.”

Kent laughed, tapped the pocket containing Sammy’s puck and shook his head. “Don’t mind at all.”

-+-

“Daddy said you gave him his because people were being bad to him.” Sammy said without prompting as she turned the puck around in her hands looking at every detail of it. “He said he was sad about something someone said and was trying to get out of his seat to go home. The game hadn’t even started. Then you gave him the puck and someone helped him find another seat and he loved it. Talked about it all the time before he went, said we should think about the good people not the bad ones.”

With an almost physical jolt Jeff remembered the image of an excited young man, not much out of his teens, sat amongst a large group of older, whiter, men just behind the bench and then the memory of the words, the shouts, the ‘what the hell do you know’ followed by the word that Jeff had hoped never to hear anywhere again in his life. Nearly three years hadn’t dimmed his anger at what he’d heard but knowing that the puck over the tunnel and the security man he’d sent to help move the guy had helped did make it all feel slightly better.

“You look like your dad when you smile,” he grinned at her and she shook her head seriously,

“Mummy says I look like her and Johnny looks like daddy,” She paused for just a moment looking down at the puck in her hands and then said more quietly, “Do you think the photos will still be at home?”

“I think,” Kent pulled the sliding hospital table, which was covered in fruit, toast and cereal for breakfast, closer and tried to change the subject before their twenty minute visit for breakfast got derailed into a missed skate, “That we should eat our breakfast and then have some milk and think really hard about the questions you want to ask Natalie later when she comes, she’ll be here when you see the doctors this afternoon and she might be able to tell you about your pictures and things because we don’t know the answers.”

“Okay,” Sammy sat up and smiled, subject changed but neither Kent nor Jeff thought it would be forgotten, and reached for a slice of toast, taking a large bite without even looking in Johnny’s direction, something she wouldn’t have done a day ago.

Jeff lifted Johnny into his lap, supporting him as he leant back against his chest, and shuffled forward until Johnny was sat across the table from Sammy, while Kent picked a few pieces of fruit from the bowl, and tore a piece of toast into soldiers, before putting them on the table in front of Johnny who reached out for a piece of toast and mashed it against his chin in an attempt to get it in his mouth, making everyone, including himself, laugh.

“You’re such a clever boy Johnny,” Kent laughed “Trying to copy Sammy.” Kent sat down in the chair next to the bed and picked up a piece of apple, crunching it between his teeth, over exaggerating the biting process just as they’d been shown by the specialist yesterday. The specialist had said that it would help encourage Johnny to copy them thus building the muscles up in his face and jaw which would help him eat and, eventually, hopefully to talk and that was all the excuse Kent needed to play with his food.

“I can do that too” Jeff grabbed a piece of banana and lifted it over Johnny’s head towards his mouth and Johnny tipped his head back against his chest to watch the movement of the food, his jaw moving slightly in time with Jeff’s. “You try again.” Jeff grinned down at him and offered him a piece of toast which he took with a smile and mashed against his lips, licking at it as Sammy clapped her hands and told him what a clever boy he was in between huge mouthfuls of her own breakfast.

“Try not to choke,” Kent laughed as Sammy coughed around a mouthful of food, “There’s time to breathe and to eat you know.”

“No if I ant” Sammy started, the words making no sense because of the piece of apple she was chewing on.

Kent shook his head and raised an eyebrow at her and Sammy quietened down, finishing chewing, and then, having opened her mouth wide to show Kent that it was empty, much to the amusement of Jeff, she tried again.

“Not if I want a cuddle before you go to work.”

Kent’s throat tightened and his heart skipped in his chest, thudding hard against his ribs, and goosebumps ran over his skin. “Well,” the word was hardly audible so he swallowed and tried again. “Well baby girl,” he stood up from his seat moving closer to the bed, “how about we cuddle while we eat, like Swoops and Johnny?”

Sammy looked at Kent cautiously, as if this was some kind of trick she didn’t understand and Kent reached for her slowly, careful not to scare her, and lifted her into his arms, sitting down with her in his lap, one arm wrapped around her waist and the other reaching for a new piece of toast, a mirror image of Jeff and Johnny across the table.

“Thank you,” Sammy said quietly, leaning heavily against Kent’s chest and he squeezed her closer, kissed the top of her head and tried to communicate everything he couldn’t say out-loud to Jeff with only the power of eye contact.

-+-

“Are you tired?” Sammy leaned closer to the screen, disappearing from view as she looked intently at Jeff’s eyes.

“A bit yeah,” Jeff laughed, “where’d you go?”

“Sit back a bit Sammy and show us what you’ve got for dinner.” Kent smiled at the screen and shooed her backwards with his hand. “What are you and Johnny having to eat?”

“I’ve got a boiled egg and toast,” she lifted her plate so that they could see.

“And what about you Johnny?” Jeff grinned and Johnny waved his messy hands at the screen, a piece of banana squishing out through his knuckles. “That looks yummy. Does it taste nice?” 

He didn’t reply, just put his fist in his mouth and sucked at the banana goo but they both smiled at him, squeezing each other’s hands under the camera, hidden from view.

“What did you have?” Sammy asked once her plate was clear.

“We had dinner a few hours ago but we’re having fruit, cereal and protein shakes for post-game. The time’s different here remember? We told you we were going a long way on our roadie didn’t we?” 

She nodded, her face turning sad and they both reached for the screen before stopping themselves, they couldn’t get through it to reassure her anyway.

“Here it’s after the game and past our bedtime, we’re only awake because that way we get to talk to you while you eat dinner.”

“Did you win? Did you score? Did you get me a puck?” Sammy brightened as she spoke.

“Yes, yes and yes, two pucks in fact because we both scored and we kept them both for you.”

“I’m so proud of you.” She said in just the same way that she told Johnny he was clever for eating his dinner, or for trying to do his exercises for the doctor and Kent’s eyes were suddenly damp, tears on his cheeks as he looked at this little girl smiling back at him.

“Thank you sweetheart,” his voice shook and Jeff squeezed his hand.

“What a beautiful thing to say,” Jeff took over, “we can’t wait to get back and see you both, see how much you’ve grown while we’ve been away.”

“Johnny’s so big now, he eats lots. When you come back?”

“One more game sweetheart and then we fly back so two sleeps and we’ll be right there for breakfast and we’re off that day so we can stay all day.”

“Yay,” she bounced on the bed and Johnny shrieked with laughter, “wish we could see game, you should sleep now, you look tired.”

“Okay beautiful girl, we’ll sleep and you two have fun playing with the nurses okay?”

“Okay” she nodded and then lifted her fist to the camera, Jeff and Kent doing the same in Boston.

-+-

“Swoops,” Jonesy shouted, crashing his arm heavy around Jeff’s shoulder and pulling him towards the locker room door, “I know you’re an old married and everything but come out with me, Please.” He dragged the please out long and loud in his ear as Jeff tried to pull away, laughing at his crazy teammate.

“I can’t,” Jeff grinned, “got plans.”

“With Parse?” 

“Yeah, with Kent”

“But Sonia’s away, please? You can bring Parse, please.”

“Nice of you to tell me I can bring the hubby,” Jeff grinned and Kent ducked his head further into his own stall trying to muffle his laugher, “why didn’t you ask him instead of me if we were two for one anyway?”

“Because he said he had to visit someone first but might come later, I don’t want to go on my own and the rookies all want to go wheeling”

“Oh,” Jeff breathed out quietly and Kent stood up out of his stall and stepped in next to them, communicating with Jeff by power of marital telepathy. “We need to stop at the hospital on the way; we can leave the car there and get a cab? If you can wait for us and keep it to yourself?”

“Oh god, I didn’t know, sorry if someone’s sick, no, its okay.”

“Its fine,” Kent put his hand on his shoulder to stop the stream of apology, “they’ll be asleep, we’ll only be there five minutes, then we’ll go somewhere to celebrate.”

“You sure? You don’t have to, Sonia’ll be home in a few days, I can celebrate then.”

“Stop,” Jeff said cutting him off, “we’re sure. It’ll be fun; just don’t say anything to anyone okay, we’re trusting you.”

“Okay” Jonesy nodded.

Leaving Jones in the car Kent and Jeff made their way into the hospital, down the corridor to the paediatric unit and stopped at the nurses’ station. 

“Great game Guys.” Sally behind the desk smiled up at them, “they’ve been asleep a while, Sammy made it to the end of the second I think, Johnny was asleep before you scored the first though.”

“Did you stay to watch the end?” Jeff laughed and Sally blushed just a little, “A few of us might have checked on them a little more often than normal through the evening yeah, I can’t really believe you set up sports TV for them, it’s not something we normally have around here.”

“Sammy said she wanted to see us play,” Kent shrugged and Sally nodded,

“It’s hard to say no to her isn’t it?”

“Yup! It’s the eyes,” Kent grinned and Jeff and Sally laughed. “We okay to go in?”

“Yeah, just don’t wake them; she’ll want her breakfast if she sees you and the kitchens shut.”

“Okay,” Jeff smiled and nodded and then they walked away towards the children’s room.

Johnny was curled up on his side, head tucked in Sammy’s armpit as she lay on her back, left hand curled into the back of Johnny’s pyjama shirt and right arm bent up above her head, and they were both sleeping peacefully, almost smiling in their sleep.

“They’re so cute when they’re asleep,” Jeff whispered as they stood together by the side of the bed, his arm tucked around Kent’s shoulder.

“They always look so peaceful; you’d never guess everything when you see them like this.”

“Just like every other kid like this,”

“But cuter,” Kent turned his head and smirked and winked at Jeff.

“Oh yeah, definitely cuter.”

Sammy snuffled in her sleep and they both froze, holding their breath until she settled again at which point Jeff dropped the gift they’d brought with them on the pillow above Johnny’s head and they left the room quickly, heading back to the car and to Jonesy who deserved a good night out in recognition of his landmark.

-+-

“I can’t let you in.” Natalie stood between them and Sammy and Johnny’s door, white as a sheet, eye red with tears. “My supervisor found out about you being here, I’m in trouble and she says she’ll suspend me if I let you in.

Jeff staggered backwards, collapsing into a chair and dropping his head into his hands and Kent crouched down next to him, arm quickly wrapped around his shoulder as he began to shake and fight back tears.

“What did we do wrong?” Kent looked up at Natalie, eyes pleading, “Have we done something to them?”

“No” Natalie shook her head and sank down into the seat next to Jeff, “You’ve given those kids everything, we’d never have found out what happened to their dad without you, they’d never have told us anything or done what the doctors wanted or anything. They’re crying in there because you’re supposed to be here and you’re not, they won’t eat lunch.” Natalie wiped at her face, “I don’t know what to do.”

Kent stood up a little, stepping between Jeff and Natalie so he could wrap one arm around each of them and he held them tight as they both cried on his shoulder his mind running as he tried to work out what to do.

“First things first,” he said eventually, “We have to make sure that they eat, they’re both doing so well, doing everything the specialists want and more than they said they’d be able to in such a short time so we can’t have that going backwards.”

Natalie and Jeff nodded against his shoulders.

“Is your boss in the room?”

“No,” Natalie shook her head, “but if she finds out I broke the rules and let you in she’ll take me off the case too and then they’ve got no one.”

“Facetime,” Jeff suddenly sat up looking at them both like he had a plan, “we facetimed on the roadie and they did what they needed to for you didn’t they?” Natalie nodded, “so let’s try facetiming them, we’ll tell them we had an unexpected roadie and will be away a few days but that we’re looking forward to seeing how much bigger and stronger they are when we get back.”

Kent leaned in and kissed Jeff softly on the cheek, “you’re a genius, you know that?” 

“Might not work,” Jeff whispered, “they might not even let us”

“I’ll let you.” Natalie stood up determinedly, “It doesn’t break the no visit rule and will be better for Sammy, she’s heartbroken that you’re late I don’t know how she’ll do if she doesn’t speak to you at all.”

“When we’ve spoken to them I’m calling our legal people, there must be something we can do.” Kent spoke directly to Jeff, “we’ve done nothing wrong, nothing but fall in love and try and make things better for two special kids, there must be something we can do.” He reached out and squeezed Jeff’s shoulder “If they have no one then there must be a way that they can have us right?”

Jeff nodded and pulled Kent into a bone crushing hug whispering into his ear, “two weeks until Christmas Kent!”

Kent squeezed him back, “I know Baby but right now we have to get it together and speak to them, we need to try and make this alright. They need us to do our best for them Okay?”

“Okay.” Jeff breathed wiping his eyes and scrubbing at his cheeks, “Okay.”


	4. Made me smile.

“We can’t just let rich men go around buying children.”

Jeff reached for Kent’s hand where his fingers were digging into his own thigh under the desk squeezing it tightly before gentling his hold as they continued to listen to Vera, Natalie’s supervisor, explain to the Judge and the frankly ridiculous number of people around the table, why she’d stop their contact with Sammy and Johnny just under forty-eight hours ago.

“What do you mean by buy?” the judge asked Vera, Natalie’s supervisor, while casting a concerned glance at Kent and Jeff.

“They’re paying for the children’s medical expenses, and additional treatments the hospital is recommending now that the money is available.”

“May I just,” Jeff and Kent’s attorney interjected and the judge turned his attention to him, raising an eyebrow. “I just wondered, Ms Nixon, if you could tell the judge how the finance is structured.”

“The what?” Vera looked at him confused.

“The money for the medical expenses, how is it dealt with? Who decides what the money is spent on?”

“There’s a trust for the children I think, the hospital and an attorney approve the payments as far as I know.”

“Just to confirm for the Judge please Ms Nixon, can you confirm that Mr Troy and Mr Parson have paid money into a trust in the name of Sammy and Johnny?”

“As I understand it.” Vera nodded.

“And that they are not the administrators of the trust?”

She nodded again.

“And, just so that the judge can be clear on this, can you confirm that the trust is funded to pay for all the children’s medical expenses until they are twenty-five whoever’s care the children are in?”

She nodded again, head ducking into her shoulders as she looked down at desk, “Yes.”

“So not so much buying the children as giving their money away to ensure that these children have the best life they can.”

Without looking up Vera whispered her agreement and the Judge nodded understanding in the attorney’s direction and then he turned his attention to Natalie.

“As the children‘s case worker can you explain the case to me please?”

“Certainly Sir,” Natalie flipped open the file in front of her, checking her notes to make sure that she didn’t miss anything. “Child A is a girl, four years old, when found she was malnourished, underweight and dirty. Child B is around eight months, when found he was reasonably well fed, although still only on milk, he presented much like a two month old in relation to physical development but he smiled and laughed when with his sister.

Kent turned his hand over on his leg and held onto Jeff’s, hearing Sammy and Johnny talked about so coldly, Child A and Child B, was hurting every part of him.

“Mother had been dead for almost a month, she had been sick for many months before that. Father died in a car accident when child B was around a month old. There is no extended family on the father’s side, on Mother’s side we contacted the grandparents and an auntie, all have refused contact. They were aware mother was ill but the nature of the mother’s marriage meant that they had cut off all contact, they did not wish to help after the accident despite mother’s illness, and they do not wish to resume contact now.”

“The nature of their marriage?” The judge enquired and Jeff and Kent both swallowed hard as they watched Natalie breathe deeply twice before she looked the judge in the eye and clasped her hands on the desk in front of her, trying to stop them shaking.

“The father was black Sir, the mother’s family disowned her and the children, they don’t want the children because they’re mixed race.”

The temperature of the room dropped as all the professionals, the doctor’s, the attorneys, the social workers and the judge, glanced around each other, the whiteness of the room suddenly feeling like it mattered, and then the judge looked at Jeff and Kent, face calm but serious. “Their heritage is not an issue for you gentlemen?”

“It’s not like we’re ever going to convince anyone they’re actually ours is it?” Jeff ground out and Kent squeezed his hand and leant into his side, resisting the urge to put his arm around him and try and make him feel better.

“What he means Sir is that we love them, the colour of their skin doesn’t come into it.”

“I met their dad, sort of,” Jeff said quietly and the judge looked at him questioningly and waited for him to continue. “That’s why Sammy trusted me when we first met her and Johnny; her dad had told her that I was a good guy because I’d helped him at a game once when some white guys didn’t think he should be there.”

“He defended our rookie last month,” Kent chipped in smiling at Jeff, “Sammy and Johnny’s skin colour isn’t a thing that makes us love them any more or any less it’s just who they are.”

The judge nodded and scribbled a note on the paper in front of him before he turned back to the professionals. “How is the children’s treatment going? What is their prognosis?” 

“They were making good progress,” the psychologist flashed a smile at Kent and Jeff. “Both children engaged well with our sessions in the presence of Mr Troy and Mr Parson. The dietician was pleased with their improved diet and the improvement in muscle tone and weight and the physiotherapist had seen great improvements, especially in the baby, who was now trying to eat food, pulling his head up and pushing up on his arms. Improvement has stalled over the last two days because Sammy won’t engage with any of us and she won’t let go of Johnny without crying which makes him cry so we aren’t sure what we’re going to do now.”

“What do you think has caused the change?” The Judge asked in a way that made it clear that he already knew the answer.

“Mr Parson and Mr Troy have been kept away from them Sir. They did their best to help the children within Ms Nixon’s rules but Sammy knows something is wrong, she knows that they aren’t on a roadie like they told her. She knows that they’re staying away when they’d normally be there for meals and nap time.” 

“How does she know this? What explanation has the child been given for the situation?”

“I was told not to tell her anything,” Natalie spoke up, “I allowed Jeff and Kent to facetime her when I was first told that they couldn’t see them and they told the children that they’d had a sudden, unexpected, roadie so wouldn’t be in to see them for a few days. They’ve been on roadies before since they met the children and we thought that was the best way to explain things. It worked for the first day but then they didn’t call at dinnertime or send photos or ring later like they normally do and things went wrong from there.”

“The nurse put the game on at bedtime,” The psychiatrist spoke, “like she always did when Mr Troy and Mr Parson couldn’t come to say good night because they were playing and Sammy watched for a few minutes as she sang to Johnny and then she suddenly stopped singing and pointed at the TV, before she looked at the nurse and said ‘that’s Aces ice.’ “

Tears were running down Kent’s cheeks and Jeff’s, as well as Natalie’s and the three doctor’s present, while Vera shuffled lower in her seat and continued to look down at the desk.

“In the morning she searched her pillow and bedside table for her puck but it wasn’t there and she hasn’t let anyone near her or Johnny without screaming since.”

“Her puck?” The judge asked and Kent reached into the inside pocket of his suit jacket, pulled out a three inch rubber disk with the Aces and Falconers logos printed on it and two signatures scrawled on the front in white sharpie, and slid it across the table to Natalie who picked it up carefully and turned it to face the Judge.

“Game day memento when these gentleman miss bedtime. They always call in and drop one off for her to find in the morning before they arrive for breakfast.”

“Will you pass that on if you’re allowed?” Kent asked and Natalie nodded, 

“If I’m allowed.” She smiled and then she set it on the corner of her paperwork and looked back to the Judge, “These gentlemen have taken these children into their lives in the last three weeks Sir, they eat with them, nap with them and help them with their therapy, they read to them, sing to them and hold them like they deserve. They’ve never let these children down, not once, not until they were forced to, they found a way to stay close even when they were away playing, these children have been through the most terrible experience in the world but I believe that with Mr Troy and Mr Parson in their lives they have a real chance of a happy future.”

“I agree,” the psychiatrist and the dietician spoke at the same time and Jeff squeezed Kent’s hand and moved closer, leaning into him

“Thank you everyone for your input.” The judge looked around the table and then physically turned his chair slightly towards Jeff and Kent. “I’ve heard a lot from everyone else but now I need to hear from you two gentleman. I need to know what you want from this, what you want from me today and what you are looking for in the future.”

“The least we want is the chance to say goodbye,” Jeff let go of Kent’s hand and leant forward, elbows on the desk, “Sammy and Johnny lost their daddy one normal sunny day when he went to work and just didn’t come home. Sammy hugged him goodbye, he kissed her head, told her to look after her brother and be good for her mum until he came home for dinner and then he just never came back.”

His voice was stable but Kent could see his whole body shaking so he moved his arm to rest his hand against the small of his back as he kept speaking.

“At just four years old Sammy watched as her mum got sicker and sicker until she couldn’t get out of bed, she cared for her brother, she did all she could to feed her mum and her brother and sometimes herself. Sammy cuddled her mum to try and make her better and slept by her side every night until well after she stopped waking up in the morning, she cared for Johnny so well mentally that he smiles, laughs, knows his name and looks at you when you feed him and when you talk to him. Sammy is the most amazing young lady I have ever met, we would give everything we have to be allowed to look after her for the rest of her life, to show her how amazing she is, to take the pressure off and allow her not to feel responsible for Johnny any more, to love her and Johnny the way they both deserve and the way that their parents would have done but for the tragic circumstances of the last year but if we can’t do that, if you agree with Ms Nixon that Sammy and Johnny are better off without us then all we ask is that you let us do better than just disappearing from their lives. Please,” 

His voice finally broke, the tears that were welling in his eyes finally overflowing down his cheeks,

“Please just let us say goodbye so that Sammy knows that we didn’t just disappear, we didn’t get bored of her or, more importantly given her life so far, that we didn’t just die while she wasn’t looking.”

“We want to take them home for Christmas and bye week,” Kent continued where Jeff had left off, “I know they need to be in hospital for months yet if they’re going to recover properly but just for a break, a few days. We want to get Sammy’s stuff from her house, her memories of her parents, and keep them safe for her while she grows up knowing that all four of her parents love her more than they could ever put into words. We want to take our pre game naps in uncomfortable hospital chairs, to sneak in to drop pucks on their pillows after a game, to rearrange naps when we’re out east so that we can facetime for breakfast or lunch and a million other things until sometime before the end of June, when the season’s done and the doctors think they’re ready, we can take them home for good.”

“Okay,” the judge nodded and took a long pause, “Thank you for such heartfelt statements gentleman, your feelings for these children are evident in your words but may I ask how you imagine that this would work without a mother at home to look after them once the children are no longer under the care of the hospital.” 

“Exactly!” Vera said loud enough for everyone to hear and the Judge looked at her with a glare, staring hard at her as she shrank back into her chair and then he turned back to look at Kent and Jeff.

“I apologise gentlemen, please forgive me for my error I worded my question incorrectly. May I ask how you imagine having the children at home would work when you are both on the road.”

“I won’t be,” Jeff relaxed back in his chair, “I’m retiring at the end of the season, I’ll be home all the time or at least I’ll be with the children all the time even if we travel with Kent which we might do if Sammy and Johnny find his absence hard. We have friends in every hockey city who we can stay with, we have family, grandparents who will love them as much as we do, and friends who are like brothers who will be awesome uncles some with wives who’ll be great aunts. I can’t tell you that we have the whole plan in place because we don’t but we’ll make it work just like other parents do.”

“We love them sir,” Kent reached for Jeff’s hand and squeezed it tight, “and if you let us we’ll look after them the very best we can for as long as we’re alive we promise.”

“Okay,” the Judge nodded and looked down at his papers, scanning through his notes and tapping his pen gently on the desk. “I have two further questions before I retire to consider the case.”

Kent clenched his teeth and Jeff squeezed his hand under the table.

“Ms Nixon,” the judge sat up straight in his chair and turned his whole body so that he could address Vera directly. “Could you please explain to me your reasons for stopping these gentlemen from spending time with the children, I presume that there was something more substantial than the fact that they are both men.”

Vera didn’t look up, mumbling “It was outside protocol” into the desk as if that was actually an answer and the Judge shook his head just slightly, as if he couldn’t stop himself, and then turned to Natalie, smiling at her with something close to sympathy in his eyes. “Would I be correct in assuming that there are other supervisors available within your Children’s protective services department who could support your work without it being coloured by blatant homophobia?”

“Yes Sir,” Natalie said excitedly and then grinned at Jeff and Kent who tried not to grin back, desperate not to get excited about something that was still a huge step away.

“Thank you all,” the judge looked around the professional at the table, “I will now retire for thirty minutes to make my decision.” He stood up from his seat at the table, pulling himself up to full height before he address Vera, “Ms Nixon your presence is no longer required,” and then he left the room leaving Kent and Jeff to the longest half hour of their lives.


	5. We shared a kiss, Our tender touch.

“I feel sick.” Kent grabbed Jeff’s hand as they got out of the car in the car park behind the hospital, “I’ve not been this nervous since game seven of our first cup.”

“I’m glad it’s not just me,” Jeff laughed, dropping his hand and wrapping his arm around his shoulder instead.

“What if she doesn’t like us anymore? Or doesn’t trust us?”

“We’re going to tell her the truth that’s all we can do.”

“I guess,” Kent nodded and stepped out from under Jeff’s arm to pull open the door, holding it for him before he followed him in and they walked quickly towards the children’s room.

“Have we missed dinner?” Jeff said with a tentative smile as he pushed the hospital room door open and the squeals that came in response made Kent’s stomach flip and his heart race in his chest as Sammy came running towards them, crashing into Jeff’s legs and reaching her hand out towards Kent.

“We missed you too beautiful,” Jeff picked her up and swung her onto his hip, holding her close as Kent wrapped his arms around them both and kissed Sammy’s cheek.

“And you as well,” Kent turned and looked at Johnny who was lying on his back on the floor frantically kicking his legs and gurgling at them like he thought they might not have noticed him. “We missed your gorgeous smile too. Can I?” Kent caught himself as he’d turned to Sammy and was about to ask her permission to pick Johnny up, and he stopped speaking until he was crouched down next to Johnny “So little man, can I pick you up?” He knew Johnny couldn’t answer, at least not in words, but he also knew that it was unfair on Sammy to keep asking her to make decisions for her brother.

Johnny smiled and kicked his legs some more and Kent took that as a yes, slipping his hands under his back and lifting him into a sitting position, still needing to support his head just a little, before he lifted him to his chest and carried him over to join Jeff and Sammy in a group hug, Sammy’s fingers curling into Kent’s shirt sleeve and holding on tightly as she relaxed her whole weight into Jeff’s chest and they stood there together letting the stress of the last couple of days drain away until Kent’s stomach rumbled loudly, making everyone laugh.

Sammy didn’t say anything but she clung to Jeff, not wanting to be put down, while he called a nurse to order dinner for them all, and she watched Kent closely as he sat down on the bed, lying Johnny down on his back between his legs and ran through his range of movement exercises while pulling faces at him and making funny noises, but both Jeff and Kent knew that they had to explain what had happened if they were ever going to earn her trust.

“Do you want to sit on my knee or on the bed?” Jeff asked Sammy when the dinner arrived. “It all looks delicious and given the noises Kent’s tummy’s been making I think he and Johnny will eat it all if we’re not quick.” 

Sammy laughed at the dramatic offended face Kent pulled at Jeff, “You hear that Johnny?” he sat Johnny up on his knee and pulled the table closer, examining the plates of vegetables, fruits, meats, bread and pasta that were scattered all over it, “They think we’re going to eat it all so where should we start?”

Johnny reached out and grabbed a fist full of pasta from the plate closest to him and rubbed his hand against his mouth making Sammy grin at him, “Look at you feeding yourself, you clever boy.” She spoke with such pride in her voice and Johnny visibly brightened to it.

“He’s been learning from his awesome big sister” Jeff squeezed her tighter and tickled at her ribs until she squirmed against his side laughing, “Shall we join them before they eat it all?”

“Yes, yes, yeah,” she gasped between laughs and Jeff carried her over, sitting them down opposite Kent and Johnny and making the decision for her by sitting her down in his knee, one arm wrapped around her middle while the other hand beeped Johnny’s nose before he grabbed a piece of ham off the plate and stuffed it clumsily into his mouth making everyone laugh again.

The plates were emptied quickly as they laughed, talked and pulled faces at each other and the three glasses of water had been drunk, which left only a bottle of milk and a carton of milkshake on the table as Kent pushed it away from the bed. “Time to wash these cute little faces and then we can cuddle up for milk okay?” Sammy nodded and Kent stood up, taking Johnny in his right arm and held his left hand out to Sammy. “Jeff can clean up the plates while I clean up you,” he grinned at Sammy at she slipped down from the bed and grabbed his hand and he winked at Jeff, “Come on let’s see if we can find a flannel.”

Once they were in the bathroom Kent sat on the closed toilet lid, with Johnny on his knee, and watched as Sammy washed his face, gently and carefully, while talking to him the whole time, and he wondered if he and Jeff were ever going to be able to match the love and care she had for her brother. She was four and had more idea of what she was doing than he did because she’d had to have in order to keep them alive. 

Three weeks ago he hadn’t changed a diaper or fed a baby and now here he was having successfully jumped the first hurdle to fatherhood, in less than two weeks’ time they would be taking these two home for Christmas, in six weeks’ time they’d have them home for a week and in six months, if they didn’t somehow mess it up before then, they’d be taking them home forever and right at the moment it felt like the most amazing and most scary thing in the whole world so he just kept watching Sammy and let his mind wander around the idea of her being his daughter.

“While you drink your milk we need to talk to you about something,” Kent said quietly and calmly as Sammy lay in his arms, looking up at him drinking her milk, while Johnny was doing the same in Jeff’s, and Sammy’s whole body tensed. “It’s nothing bad, I promise.” He stroked his fingers slowly up and down her side encouraging her to relax. “We missed you the last couple of days.” She tensed again, but curled closer to him. “We know that you know we weren’t on a roadie and we’re both really sorry that we told you something that wasn’t true.”

“We didn’t want to lie to you,” Jeff took over, smiling at Johnny, “But a lady came and told us we weren’t allowed to come and see you and we thought that it might be less upsetting for you to think that we were away like the other times while we tried to sort it out.”

Sammy pushed the carton from her mouth with her tongue and stretched up to look at Jeff over Kent’s arm. “Did you sort it?”

“Yes sweetheart,” Jeff nodded at her and Kent squeezed her tighter, “and then we came straight here as quickly as we could because we missed you and because we wanted to say sorry for lying to you.”

“That’s ok,” Sammy said as if it was that simple and settled back in Kent’s arms, tapping his hand for the milk, “you won’t go away again though will you?”

“We won’t go without telling you,” Kent put the milk back to her mouth, “We will still have to go on our roadies though, that’s our job, but we’ll make sure you know when and we’ll facetime like we did before and we’ll be here as soon as we’re home okay?” 

Sammy nodded a little reluctantly but kept drinking her milk.

“We have one trip,” Jeff sat Johnny up on his knee, patting his back as he finished his milk. “Two games in three days just before we have some time off for Christmas but we’re home for a whole week before we go so you’re going to see lots of us.”

Johnny burped loudly and then grinned at them all when they laughed 

“You fed up of us talking Johnny?” Kent laughed, “Shall we get on with some playing before bedtime instead?”

“Come on then,” Jeff wiped the milk from his chin, put the empty bottle back on the table and kissed Sammy’s forehead where she still lay in Kent’s arms before he moved to the pile of toys on the floor that the children had been playing with when they arrived and lay Johnny down on his tummy, lying down next to him and handing him a rattle.


	6. I held you there, I felt the love

The day before their last roadie before Christmas Coach had given the team the day off for the traditional pre-Christmas family skate and with permission from the doctors, and from Natalie who was still completing the assessments ordered by the judge, Sammy and Johnny were escaping the hospital for a few hours and Kent and Jeff were going to be on their own with them for the first time and they were both more than slightly terrified.

Coach knew about the children, Kent and Jeff had sat down with him the day before the court hearing to explain who all the pucks had been for and why they’d been spotted at the hospital a few times, they’d also had to ask for the day off for the hearing which he’d given without reservation, but no one else in the organisation knew anything so, as far as the team were concerned, the children were coming as a charity project which made Kent feel more uncomfortable now that it was happening than it had when he’d suggested it.

“They’re going to expect cameras and stuff aren’t they? The guys. Or to get to play with them.”

“Probably,” Jeff acknowledged, “Doesn’t mean they’re going to get to though,” he grinned and pulled his cap onto his head.

“I guess,” Kent laughed, “some pictures would be good though, like the other guys take.”

“I checked with Natalie last night, she says photos are good as long as we don’t share them with the world.”

“Really?” Kent’s eyes widened and his whole face grinned.

“Yup! Come on lets go get them.”

-+-

“That’s Aces ice.” Sammy tugged on Jeff’s arm and whispered up at him, wide eyed.

He crouched down next to her, putting his arm around her shoulder and leaning in to whisper in her ear, “It is, would you like to come skating on it?”

“Really?” she gasped and bounced on her feet.

“That’s why we brought you here; family skate is the best Aces tradition.”

Sammy looked at him quizzically for a long moment and then she turned to Johnny who was sat in Kent’s arm, “Daddy would be so jealous of us skating with Swoops Johnny.”

Kent closed his eyes for a long moment, willing the tears to dry up and his stomach to slip back down his throat and then he ruffled Sammy’s hair with his free hand, “I’m sure mummy and daddy will be looking down smiling so why don’t we go and put on a show?”

“Come on,” Jeff pushed himself back to his feet and led the way to the bench where he and Kent took turns tying themselves into their skates, passing Johnny between them and then Kent helped Sammy into her tiny two bladed boots that he’d never known even existed until coach had suggested them. 

“You ready?” 

Sammy nodded and dropped herself down from the bench onto her feet, “What about Johnny?”

“We’re just going to carry him,” Jeff checked the zip on his all in one before he picked him up to his chest, “he’s not strong enough to stand yet but maybe next time.”

“Next time” Kent grinned as he mouthed it at Jeff and then leant over the children to kiss the smile from his lips before he stepped on to the ice and held Sammy’s hand as she stepped over the lip and slid almost gracefully towards him, much to her surprise.

They skated around lazily, showing the children the big Aces logo at centre ice, the blue paint around the goal and the face off dots before sitting Sammy in the penalty box and then letting her shut the door on Jeff after he pretended to check Kent and Johnny into the wall and they were all so wrapped up in their game that none of them had really noticed the other players who had taken the ice until a voice interrupted them. “You must be the little ones we’ve heard about.”

Sammy stopped suddenly at the voice and slipped backwards, falling on her bottom before scrambling to her feet and hiding behind Jeff, face peeking out around him.

“Sorry” Jones raised his hands and slid backwards, “I didn’t mean to scare you sweetheart.”

“It’s ok Sammy,” Jeff prised Sammy’s fingers from their grip on his trousers and lifted her up, holding her tightly and safely before he drifted closer to Jones, “other teams players are scared of Jonesy but he’s a softy really I promise.” 

Jones stayed still, his hands still in the air, and smiled at Sammy, “Are you having fun with Swoops and Parser?” 

“Kent,” Jeff clarified when Sammy looked at him in confusion and then she turned back to Jones and nodded slowly.

“Is this your little brother?” he pointed at Johnny and Sammy nodded, “he looks like he’s enjoying himself.” Sammy smiled and then laughed when Kent helped Johnny wave at Jones.

“Next time we come he might be able to skate too.”

“Yeah?” Jones asked smiling warmly at her.

“Swoops said so.”

Sammy grinned and turned her head to kiss Jeff’s cheek and snuggle under his chin and Jones looked between Jeff and Kent and then, as if a whole world of things suddenly made sense, he looked away from them to Sammy and offered his fist for a bump, “If Swoops said it then I’ve no doubt that it’ll be true.”

They skated for over an hour and then, once the ice was clear of other skaters, Kent sent a quick text before laying Johnny on the dot at centre ice, where he kicked his legs and squealed at the cold on his back as Kent lay down next to him, holding his hand and making ice angels. “Sammy,” he called, “Bring Swoops over here and have a go.”

Johnny laughed and squealed as Sammy slid in beside him, holding his other hand as she copied Kent.

“Children,” Jeff tutted and laughed as he skated circles around them, “Nothing but children.” 

“That’s why you love us,” Kent laughed.

“Yeah,” Jeff dropped dramatically to the ice next to Sammy, grabbing her hand to join the ice angel chain, “that’s why I love you.”

-+-

“You fly away in the morning after breakfast but will be back after three sleeps,” 

“That’s right.”

“And you’ll ring at dinner and lunch and breakfast but not bedtime because you’re playing hockey then.”

“Yeah.”

“But you’ll send photos after the game and bring pucks home.”

“We will, yeah.”

“And Natalie will come and see us while you’re away but only so we’re not lonely, not like last time.”

“You’ve got it sweetheart,” Kent snuggled her closer, “We’re not leaving you just going away with work for a few days and then we’re back for Christmas.”

“And we still get to come home with you for Christmas?” Sammy asked, hope and nerves clear in her voice.

“If you still want to sweetheart, we want you both to come and spend Christmas with us but only if you want to.”

“I want to,” she looked up at him “Even if I have to come back.” 

“Hey missy,” Jeff sat down next to them on the bed, Johnny just about asleep on his shoulder, “You know that right now you need to be in hospital because the doctors and nurses know how to help you and Johnny get stronger and feel better which is why you’re staying here most of the time but that doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy a little Christmas trip home for a few days before you get back to your hard work.”

“I know,” she said sleepily, curling in closer to Kent’s side as Jeff settled back against the headboard next to Kent, “I know.”

“For now though, beautiful,” Jeff put his hand warm and solid on her back, “go to sleep, we’ll be here when you wake up.”


	7. An Angel Sent From Heaven Up above.

“You look all set to me,” Natalie put her cup down on the coffee table, “how are you feeling?”

“Terrified,” Kent laughed and Natalie smiled at him.

“That’s normal; I’d be more worried if you weren’t if I’m honest.”

“That’s a relief” Jeff offered the plate of mince pies and Natalie took one.

“Oh!” she said as she took a bite of the pie, “That’s good!” 

“Aren’t they just” Kent took a bite of his own, “A treat from a friend, he thought we needed something special given the circumstances.”

“Well they’re definitely that.” She took another bite and then set the rest down next to her cup of tea. “We don’t know what Christmas was like for Sammy last year, before all this happened, so be aware that she may expect things or want things that we’re not currently aware of. Saying no is fine; they need to hear it sometimes, just be gentle on them and more importantly on yourselves.”

Kent and Jeff exchanged glances and Natalie tapped her pen on the pad on her knee. “Parenting is hard when you get to learn it in stages and to set all the rules, stepping in for children like Sammy and Johnny is a whole other level and one that needs you to care for each other as much as the children. It’s okay to get things wrong you’ve just got to shake it off and, as you would say, focus on the next shift.” She grinned and they both laughed.

“We’ll get you some tickets, when this is all done and it can’t be considered a bribe, then you’ll at least have seen a game having scheduled yourself and the kids around it and listened to us talk about it all the time.”

“I’d better get this all finished before the end of the season then, before you retire and become a full time dad.” 

Jeff froze in his seat, eyes wide and breathing stalled, and then slowly a smile broke onto his face, “Full time dad,” the words whispered out, “Dad.” He turned to Kent and reached for his hand. “Gay plus hockey equalled lonely, scared and closeted when I was a young not married with kids.”

“Yeah,” Kent squeezed his hand, “We’ve got a bit more than the pies to thank Bits and Zimms for that’s for sure.”

“Dads though, me and you.” 

“Yup” Kent nodded and then they both turned back to Natalie who was watching them while she scribbled something on the paper in front of them.

“Bits and Zimms?” she asked, “Are they family or friends or something? We’ve done your family trees and I’ve spoken to everyone but I don’t remember those names, should I?”

“They’re friends,” Kent replied, “Zimms is Jack Zimmermann of the Falconers, I’ve known him since juniors, we had something in common you know,” he laughed and Natalie smiled, clearly understanding what he meant, “and he’s married to Bits, Eric Bittle, he runs a catering business and a skating and hockey program for LGBTQ and underprivileged kids. Both of them are out in Providence, they aren’t family, good friends but not quite family, I can give you their numbers if you want.”

“That makes sense, are they coming for Christmas?”

“No, no one’s coming, we didn’t want to over face Sammy and Johnny” Jeff paused and took a breath. “If we‘re honest we didn’t want to share them, selfish maybe but we just want to spend some time just the four of us, no doctors or nurses or anyone, just us.”

“Not selfish,” Natalie winked, “Just very sweet.”

“He is isn’t he?” Kent patted Jeff’s thigh

“Not just him,” Natalie fixed him with a stare, “You’re just as sweet and Sammy and Johnny are very lucky that you took the time to notice them and to ask to meet them that day.”

-+-

“We’re going out into the car park,” Kent squeezed Sammy’s tiny hand in his, “so you’ve got to keep hold and stay safe ok.”

“Okay” Sammy squeezed back and then they followed Jeff and Johnny out through the back door to where they’d hidden their car about an hour ago when they’d arrived to pick the children up. 

“Is that your car?” Sammy gasped wide eyed and Kent’s stomach lurched. They’d been to the children’s family home just last week to collect their possessions and it had been nothing like either of them had imagined but the car they’d brought to pick up the children had probably cost half as much as that house. 

A friendly looking house with a pretty front garden and room out back for a small jungle gym and a little purple play house had not been what Kent or Jeff had expected but it made more sense that neighbours wouldn’t have noticed things going wrong than it had when they’d imagined a small apartment closely surrounded by lots of other people living their lives. The house was full of photographs, toys and keepsakes and the fridge was covered with pictures clearly drawn by a younger Sammy. There was evidence in the kitchen of all the ways that Sammy had told them that she’d cared for Johnny and, in what had clearly been a playroom, there was a piano, with music still stood on the stand.

As respectfully as they could, trying to preserve things without feeling too nosey, Jeff and Kent had spent two days boxing everything up and moving the boxes to be stored in the empty double garage at their house. Some exceptions had been made, most notably for Daddy’s puck, which Jeff had taken a few moments with, remembering the smile and enthusiasm of the young man and silently promising him that he’d never let his children forget him, and then it’d been taken straight to Sammy who’d held it close to her chest, tears running down her cheeks before she’d introduced it to the growing collection on her bedside table, talking to it as if she was speaking to her father. 

“It is,” Jeff grinned at her, “you want to jump in? Your seat’s in the back, right next to Johnny’s.”

Kent and Sammy went one side and Jeff and Johnny the other and very quickly the children were fastened into their seat, Johnny facing backwards meaning that Sammy could hold his hand and chat and pull faces at him throughout the short trip home while Jeff and Kent grinned at each other at every red light like excited children and tried to focus on getting them all home and locked behind their front gates as quickly possible.

“When you were in mummy’s tummy,” Sammy whispered to Johnny as they pulled through the gate and up the driveway, coming to a stop outside the house. “Daddy took us to a hotel that looked like this, with a pool that mummy spent all day in because she didn’t hurt so much in there.”

Kent and Jeff exchanged glances and sad smiles and then Jeff turned around in his seat “Did you have fun there with Mummy and Daddy sweetheart?” 

“Yes,” She grinned, “Daddy taught me how to swim without floaties, he said I was his clever big girl when I did it and he said I was ready to be a big sister now.”

“Daddy was right because you’re an awesome big sister isn’t she Johnny?” Jeff reached through between the seats and offered his fist to Sammy who grinned as she bumped hers with his. “Shall we go have a look inside?”

“Yes!” Sammy shouted and Johnny squealed and kicked the back of the seat.

“Come on then.”

-+-

Sammy kept a grip on Kent’s hand as they crossed the drive and stepped through the front door of the house and then he knelt down to help her with her shoes, putting them on the rack by the door next to his and Jeff’s and giving himself a moment to take in the sight of them. 

“There’s space next to yours for Johnny’s when he gets a bit stronger.” Jeff smiled down at her and squeezed Johnny just a little tighter. “We might need some more racks later, when your feet get bigger though.”

“A Green one?” Sammy asked, “Mummy had one by the door.”

Kent bounced to his feet, “Wait here one minute okay? With Jeff?” 

Sammy scrunched up her forehead in confusion but nodded at him and Kent grinned at her and ran out of the door, around the side of the house to the garage, quickly finding what he was looking for before rushing back to the house and in through the door, dropping to his knees to put the small green shoe rack in his hands down and move Sammy’s shoes to rest on it.

“Is that?” Sammy started to speak and then snuffled as she started to cry.

“Yes sweetheart,” Kent turned on his knees and wrapped his arms around her, holding her close, cradling her head against his shoulder and rubbing her back gently. “We brought everything we could.”

“Pictures?” She whispered between sobs “Of mummy and daddy.”

“Yes baby girl,” Jeff knelt down next to them, tucking Johnny between him and Kent as he enveloped the three of them in arms, “We brought your photos, they’re in a box in your room and we’ll help you put them up if you want. Shall we go and have a look?”

Nodding against Kent’s shoulder, her words lost in sobs, Jeff took that as agreement and pushed up to his feet, putting Johnny back on his hip and giving Kent the room to stand up, Sammy cradled against his chest.

“Your room is right next to ours so that you know where we are if you want us in the night and there’s a button you can press next to your bed that will wake us up if you don’t want to get out of bed of if we’re sleeping okay?” Sammy nodded under his chin, tears still falling down her cheeks, as they walked up the stairs and down the hall to the Master bedroom. “Me and Jeff sleep in here,” Kent waved at the bed as he walked around it and opened the door on the opposite wall, “And you two are going to sleep in here.”

Sammy sat up a little glancing around the room at the bed against the wall on the right and the wardrobe and chest of drawers on the left, two boxes and a bag sitting on the floor in front of them.

“The bed has sides on so that you won’t fall out” Jeff set Johnny down on the bed and when Sammy released her grip on him slightly Kent set her down next to him, “and it’s big enough for all of us to cuddle up in for stories before sleep.”

“Is that the pictures?” Sammy cut through what Jeff was saying and he stopped and smiled at her.

“Yes Sweetheart, those are the boxes of pictures we found, would you like to look.”

“Please?”

-+-

They spent over an hour sorting through the photos and listening to Sammy tell Johnny all about their parents and they helped her choose which pictures she wanted to stand on top of the chest of drawers and which would be put safely back in the boxes for another time and by the time all the decisions were made Johnny was hungry and Sammy was yawning.

“Lunch is ready in the kitchen so why don’t we go and eat before we have a nap. You can explore the rest of the house after sleep?”

“Are there tomatoes?” 

“Yes there are,” Kent smiled, “And peppers and cucumber and bread and meat and lots of things. There are even mince pies for pudding if you have space in your tummy for them”

“Yummy” Sammy rubbed her tummy and licked her lips and Johnny laughed at her. “We’ll eat all the mince pies won’t we Johnny?”

He stuck his tongue out at her and Sammy leant in to kiss his nose and hug him and he lifted his arms to try and hug her back, curling his fist into the shoulder of her t-shirt.

“Extra special pies for extra special babies, that’s what they said on the box anyway.”

“We’re special babies?”

“You are,” Kent lifted Johnny into his arms and Jeff did the same with Sammy, “You really are.”

-+-

 **Kent:** [photo of Christmas tree attached] I can’t believe that we paid thousands of dollars to have this tree decorated last year and it looked nowhere near as good as this :D

 **Bits:** That is so beautiful, were they happy to have their decorations from home as well as the new ones?

 **Zimms:** Did you all have fun?

 **Bits:** sorry I didn’t mean home, I meant before.

 **Kent:** Home works Bits don’t worry and yes we had great fun, Sammy talked about her mum and dad so much and she asked about when we were kids and what we used to do and if Santa ever brought us anything.

 **Jeff:** She was all over all the little ornaments our parents had sent up for us, they’re all on the tree with hers from her mum and dad and we made a new thing for the top.

 **Jeff:** [photo of a large white star with four gold handprints on] Johnny loved the paint on his hands, Sammy not so much :D

 **Zimms:** Their hands are tiny! Or you two are just huge ;) 

**Kent:** A bit of both probably ;)

 **Jeff:** Behave Mr Parson :D 

**Bits:** Behave both of you, there’re kids in the house now! Are they asleep all ready for Santa to come? Santa is coming right?

 **Kent:** Yes Bits, Santa’s coming. The kids put out two of your pies and a glass of milk for Santa and some carrots for the reindeer as well as a bag of sweets for the elves, Coach saved our skin with the sweets, I never knew things for the elves was a thing!!

 **Zimms:** Tut Tut Tut Kenny you can’t leave out the elves ;D If I ask you both a question do you promise to answer it honestly?

 **Kent:** erm I think so.

 **Jeff:** depends what it is, I’m not embarrassing my husband, he’ll kill me before I get my presents :D

 **Bits:** Behave jack!

 **Zimms:** I am behaving Bits!! I just wanted to know who’s more excited Jeff, Kent or the kids?

 **Kent:** Jeff!

 **Jeff:** ME!

 **Zimms:** Glad you’re in agreement :D 

**Jeff:** I just keep remembering my first Christmas, it’s not the same because Sammy and Johnny’s mum and dad loved them and they’ve already got traditions and special things and stuff but it still feels a bit like that. 

**Zimms:** Your and their second first Christmas :D

 **Jeff:** something like that yeah. :)

 **Zimms:** Enjoy yourselves Guys.

 **Bits:** Enjoy it Jeff, you too Kent xxx

 **Kent:** thanks guys, enjoy your day too. Xx.


	8. I can't let go, I'm Paralysed,

“Do you think we’re allowed to wake them up yet?” Jeff was stood in the doorway of the children’s room, arms wrapped around Kent’s chest as he draped himself over his back and they leant against the door frame watching the children curled up together, sleeping in the middle of their bed.

“No,” Kent shook his head and tipped up his chin to reach for a kiss, “I think that we’re supposed to enjoy the sleeping bit before it all gets crazy later.”

“But it’s seven thirty Kent,” Jeff wined “I want to see if Santa’s been.”

“I know baby,” Kent turned in his arms and patted his chest, eyes glinting up at him in mischief, “I know you’re excited to see if you’ve been a good boy this year but waking up sleeping children is not good, everyone we’ve spoken to tells us that, and I don’t want to find out it really is a Gremlins type thing, not today anyway.”

Jeff smiled and pulled Kent closer, tucking him under his chin and rubbing his back before he tucked his mouth close to his ear and whispered “I don’t need Santa anyway, I’ve got you three.” 

“I love you”

“Love you too.” 

By the time the children woke up Jeff and Kent had made a breakfast of fruit, pancakes and ice cream, they’d taken turns in the cooking and the carrying of things up to the bedroom, not leaving the children for more than a minute at a time for fear of missing them waking up, and when they heard Sammy speak to Johnny, “I think it’s Christmas” they both rushed across their room to the door grinning at her like excited children.

“Merry Christmas,” they shouted at the same time and Sammy jumped up to her feet, bouncing on the bed squealing as Johnny giggled beside her.

“It’s Christmas, it’s Christmas it’s Christmas.” She sang as Jeff grabbed her under the arms and swung her around, grinning and joining in the song.

“They’re mad aren’t they Johnny,” Kent moved around the bed, away from Sammy and his crazy husband and picked Johnny up off the bed, holding him with his back to his chest, one hand under his bottom and the other splayed across his chest holding him upright so that he could watch his sister dancing, “But we love them don’t we?” He kissed Johnny’s cheek and blew a raspberry against his neck making him squeal and wave his arms and legs.

“Breakfast children!” Kent spoke loudly enough to break through the song and Jeff stopped dancing, turning to look at him, and pulling a sulky face. “Yes dad!” Jeff said without thinking and then panicked just a little until Sammy laughed at the look on his face and said exactly the same thing knocking all the air of Kent’s lungs.

-+-

“How you know about ice cream?” Sammy asked with a grin after she’d finished eating her breakfast. “How you know mummy gives us ice cream because no snow?”

“We didn’t know why you had it we just thought it sounded scrummy?” Kent put the last fork full of pancake in his mouth and grinned at her.

“Do you remember when you first met Jane? The lady with the big box of foods to try?” Sammy nodded, “You told her that mummy and daddy only let you have ice cream as a treat, do you remember?” It took a few seconds, Sammy seemingly scanning her brain for the memory, and then she nodded. “We though Christmas probably counted as one of those treat days.”

“It does” She grinned, “Birthdays and Christmas always had ice cream.”

“That’s a tradition we’re very much adopting,” Jeff winked at her and Sammy grinned wider, “If we’re finished though shall we go downstairs and see if Santa’s been?”

“Yes yes yes,” Sammy bounced on the bed, knocking over a plate and the bowl of fruit, spilling juice all over the sheets.”

“Hey,” Kent reached out and put his hand on her shoulder to stop her moving, “You need to be more careful than that.” 

It wasn’t harsh, and certainly not anything close to his captains voice, but he spoke more forcefully than he had before and Sammy stopped moving instantly and looked up at him, eyes wider than normal and lip quivering just a little. “Sorry,” her voice shook and she sniffed back a tear as she continued to stare at him.

“It’s ok,” Kent’s voice softened, “I’m not cross we just need to be a little bit more careful because I don’t want to spend all day washing sheet instead of playing with you.” He winked and smiled and Sammy smiled shyly back at him, “Jump up and help me get these changed and then we’ll go open some presents yeah?”

“Yeah” Sammy nodded and crawled off the bed, grabbing one of the pillows and pulling at the cover while Jeff and Kent moved the plates, bowls and cups into a pile on the dresser and lifted Johnny off the duvet, putting him back down in middle of the bed, and worked around him as the three of them worked together to strip the sheets, put a new sheet on the mattress and new cases on the pillows, before Jeff picked Sammy up by the waist, hanging her upside down for a second, tickling her ribs, and then he set her down next to Johnny in the middle of the bed.

“I’m going to show you a magic trick,” he said to Kent while side eyeing the children with a smirk.

“Yeah?”

“Yup” He nodded reaching for the duvet, “I’m going to make these two beautiful children disappear!” He waved his hand at Sammy and she took the hint, lying down next to Johnny and grabbing his hand.

“You can’t do that” Kent waved his hands at the children, “No way can you do a trick like that.”

“I bet I can,” Jeff grinned and Sammy and Johnny laughed, “Close your eyes and count to five.” 

“One, two, three,” Kent did as he was told.

Jeff put his finger to his lips in a shush motion at the children and then shook the duvet out, laying it down over them.

“Four, five.” Kent opened his eyes and grabbed Jeff’s hand, pulling him in for a quick kiss. “Oh no!” He exclaimed “Where have they gone?”

The giggles were getting louder and the sheets were moving as Johnny kicked them and Sammy tried not to move.

“They must be somewhere,” Kent continued, patting his hands up and down the side of the bed getting closer and closer to the children until his hands landed on them where he tickled them both through the covers until Sammy was shrieking and kicking at the sheets to push them off.

“Found them!” Kent grinned as he pulled the covers back to reveal the children and jumped on to the bed next to them, snuggling his arm around them both.

“Oh good,” Jeff led down on the other side wrapping his arm over all of them and resting his hand on Kent’s hip, “I was missing them.”

-+-

Aces shirts, two each, one Parson one Troy, a mini sticks set, a dolly with pram and highchair, two cuddly toys, one a bear in a Samwell 15 jersey the other a providence falcon with a 1 on its back, and a giant teddybear that doubled as a support seat, made up the children’s Christmas presents, while Jeff and Kent got socks, a crazy shirt and a DVD each, as was their tradition, which left one present remaining, leaning against a chair, with all four names on it. 

“To Jeff, Kent, Sammy and Johnny.” It said in gold lettering on the black wrapping paper, writing recognisable to Jeff and Kent from many a play board and roster list. ‘Fragile’ was written in large letters across the top right corner.

“I think we need to be careful with this one,” Jeff said as he set in down on the floor between them and then picked Johnny up to his knee, “So let’s open it gently okay?”

Sammy nodded and reached to pull open one side while Jeff helped Johnny to pull at the other and once all the tape was removed and the paper pulled back, revealing the back of a photo frame, Kent picked the present up and turned it over, putting it back down in the middle of them.

“That’s us,” Sammy grinned, “When we skated.”

“Who took this?” Jeff looked at Kent

“He said he hadn’t managed,” Kent shook his head and blinked back tears as he looked at the picture of the four of them, led at centre ice, holding hands, laughing and making ice angels, “I asked him to get a photo if he could find a way when we were there but he said he hadn’t managed.”

“Coach?”

“Yeah, coach, he must have snuck this in yesterday when he dropped the things in.”

Sammy crawled around the picture and into Kent’s lap, wiping a stray tear from his eye and then putting her arms around his neck and shushing him as she patted his back. 

“Thank you for the hug Sweetheart, I’m not sad I promise.”

“I know,” she sat back and smiled at him, “not all tears sad but all tears should have hugs.”

“That they should beautiful,” he smiled at her and pulled her in for a crushing hug, kissing the top of her head.

“Where are we going to put the picture?” Jeff asked Johnny as he pushed up to his feet, Johnny on his hip, and picked the picture up to move it out of the strike reach for Sammy’s foot while she was wriggling in Kent’s lap being tickled.

“Can we…. Can…. Could…” Sammy gasped between laughs until Jeff glared at Kent and he stopped tickling her to let her speak. “Can we put it in our room with mummy and daddy?” 

“Yeah,” Jeff nodded, eyes blinking and lips pressed together, “We can,” his words stumbled and Sammy glanced back over her shoulder at Kent, looking worried, so Kent jumped them both up to their feet and they were across the room, hugging Jeff, in the blink of an eye.

“That sounds like a perfect place for it sweetheart, great idea.”

-+-

**To Coach:** I promise to never tell the rookies how sweet you really are ;) Thank you so much.

**Coach:** I’ll skate you to death if you do! You might want to check Jeff’s skate bag :D enjoy your day.

**To Coach:** Should I be worried? ;)

**Coach:** Just go look and stop wasting time on me you’ve a dinner to cook!

**To Coach:** you know me better than that!! Dinner will be delivered ready to eat as always, Dima’s planning a serious New Year party as ever :D

**Coach:** one day I’m going to get to him first :D

**To Coach:** You wouldn’t do that to me! I’d just pay him more than you anyway ;)

**Coach:** Go check the bag and leave me in peace!

“Apparently we need to check your Skate bag.” 

“What?”

“Coach says to check your skate bag, that’s all I know.”

“Okay.” Jeff left the children to their playing on the rug and walked down the hall to the closet, dragging his bag out. “Any clue what I’m looking for?”

“Nope,” Kent laughed, “How much weird stuff do you keep in there? I’d know if there was something extra in my bag as soon as I picked it up.”

“Stop picking on me,” Jeff wined “you’re always picking on” he suddenly stopped speaking, a long silence following, and Kent got up from the couch to go and investigate.

“What you got there?” Jeff was crouched over his bag staring at a book in his hands. “You ok?”

“Yeah,” Jeff reached a hand out towards Kent encouraging him to join him in his crouch, “Just looking at this.” He tipped his arm towards Kent, showing him the photo album he had in his hand. “There’s a picture of us by the bench tossing in the first puck we saved for Sammy and one of us smiling at your phone taking a picture, I think it’s from Washington, that first roadie when we sent pictures to the kids.”

“Really?” Kent leaned closer to have a look.

“Yeah, this one,” Jeff pointed to the page in front of him, “is the day we knew Sammy was watching when we both looked for the camera after I scored, there’s loads of pictures from family skate as well but these ones, he flicked through the first few pages of the book, the kids aren’t even in these but they are you know.”

“This must have taken ages; I wonder which intern got the job.” Kent laughed and Jeff turned his head to look him in the eye.

“But we told him in secret, he wouldn’t tell anyone.”

“Then how?”

“I think he did it himself.”

“Really,” Kent looked at Jeff, face scrunched in disbelief, “No way he took the time to do that.”

“He did for the wedding, those pictures from over the years, of us being so bloody obvious.”

“Team effort, that was a team effort.”

“Coach is the only guy who’s been here all the time.”

Kent toppled himself backwards, sitting down against the wall, knees tucked into his chest and arms wrapped around them. “Let’s have a proper look then,” he tapped the floor next to him and Jeff took the hint sitting down next to him and turning the pages as they rested together smiling their way through Coach’s handiwork.

**To Coach:** Did you really do this? It’s amazing.

**Coach:** I might have asked an intern to put me some tape together of some specific Parson Troy plays so I could screen shot things but yeah, I haven’t told anyone if that’s what you’re worried about. I took the skate photos; sorry for stalking you and for saying I didn’t manage :D

**To Coach:** It’s amazing, thank you; Jeff thinks you did the wedding one too? The game pictures are great; I can’t believe you did that.

**Coach:** Pregnancy photoshoots are a thing apparently, we’ve just bought Jenny and Chris one for Christmas :-D and yes, I did a lot of the wedding one, you tell the rookies anything and they’re all on double skate for a month!

**To Coach:** Won’t say a word, I might tell your grandkid one day though, they should know that they have a grandad to be proud of.

**Coach:** That’s fair, I’ll be telling Sammy and Johnny that about their dads as soon as I get to meet them :D now go enjoy Christmas, we’re supposed to be off and I don’t want the NHLPA on my back ;)

**To Coach:** :D xx


	9. Time stood still the day,

The highchair had been custom made with the height fully adjustable and the seat fitted exactly to Johnny’s tiny body. It had a strong yet soft chest pad that supported him in sitting up properly but, as he was demonstrating right now, left his hands and arms free to bash on the table while he laughed and grinned at Sammy as Jeff and Kent served Christmas dinner from heated containers on to four plates.

“Roast, mash or boiled potatoes?” Jeff turned to Sammy waving the serving spoon.

“Yes” Sammy said, face blank until Kent laughed loudly and then she broke out in a grin.

“Okay then, all three it is,” Jeff grinned, blew her a kiss and then turned to Johnny, “and you?”

“Just mash,” Sammy answered for him, “Still working on the chewing muscles,” she said, parroting the words and tone Jeff had used over dinner last night and Kent laughed again, hip checking Jeff who shook his head and rolled his eyes in resignation at being mimicked so well.

“Carrots, Sprouts and parsnips for both of you? They’re soft enough for Johnny right?”

“They’re soft but they’re yuck!” she stuck her tongue out and made a blurrgh sound and Johnny banged his fists on the table again, kicking his feet underneath.

“Pick one and don’t be so rude.”

“I don’t like any of them!”

“Pick one and promise to eat it or the next offer will be two,” Jeff said, not turning away from where he was serving a healthy portion of vegetables on to the adult’s plates and a piece of carrot, one of parsnip and a small sprout onto Johnny’s for Kent to chop up.

“But I don’t like them!” Sammy slapped her hand down on the table making the cutlery jump slightly.

“You haven’t even tried them and that is certainly not the way to ask for something different so take a breath and try again or you’ll be having all three and no treats until you’ve eaten them all.” 

Jeff was so calm and yet so matter of fact and Kent wanted to hug him and hide behind him all at the same time because his heart was racing and his stomach was churning as he waited to see what Sammy would do next.

“If I ask more good can I have something instead?”

“If you ask more nicely you certainly have more chance.”

“Please can I have something else?”

“Like what?” Jeff continued with serving dinner, not even looking at her and Kent tried to do the same while desperately wanting to fix this thing that probably wasn’t even broken.

“Mummy let me have raw carrots, they’re crunchy not mushy.”

“Sticks or circles?” 

“She did sticks, they’re easier to hold.”

“So if we make you some crunchy carrot sticks will you agree to try a sprout?”

There was silence for a long moment and Jeff reached for Kent’s hand where it was curled, white knuckle, around the edge of the counter top and held tight, stopping him from turning around to look at her.

“Half,” Sammy broke the silence, “I eat half sprout and carrot sticks.”

“Half,” Jeff said, considering the offer carefully before he turned around, raising his fist to Sammy who sealed the deal by tapping their knuckles together, “it’s a deal,” he smiled, “well done you for making it.” She beamed at the praise and he winked at her and then went back to his serving, taking a second to pull Kent in by the hip and kiss his temple.

Johnny needed a bath by the time he’d finished eating his dinner, mashed potato in his hair, carrots and sprouts in his ears, stuffing up his nose and gravy all over his chin, and Sammy could have done with a bit of a wash too but no one was leaving the table without pudding, cherry pie with fresh cream, and not only because they’d have had to explain themselves to Bitty.

“Please can I have ice cream?” Sammy asked ducking her head a little and looking between Jeff and Kent, “I don’t really like cream.”

“I don’t kno” Kent started but Jeff tapped his foot under the table and cut him off.

“Yes sweetheart, you can,” Sammy brightened, “I’m proud of you for asking so nicely.” She grinned and her cheeks blushed and Kent tapped Jeff’s foot in understanding and knocked fists with Sammy.

“Shall we all have ice cream? Bits will never know.”

“Bits?” Sammy asked, confused.

“Bitty,” Kent smiled, “Eric Bittle, he’s our friend who made the pie; he made the mince pies from yesterday too. He likes baking and he’s a really fast skater,”

“Not as fast as you!” she said as if it was a fact and Kent accepted the belief with a nod of his head and smile even if he knew that it probably wasn’t true.

“Pie and ice cream for you too Johnny?”

Johnny gurgled and bashed on the table which Kent took as agreement and served up four portions of pie.

“Nice,” Sammy spoke with her mouthful of pie and Jeff raised an eyebrow at her making her cover her mouth with her hand and finish chewing and swallowing before she spoke again, “I like it!”

“I’m glad,” Kent smiled before eating a spoonful of his and then nodding and smiling at her, “It is very good. Pass me your spoon Johnny,” Kent turned his attention to Johnny who was dipping his hands in the bowl and scrunching the cold ice cream in his fist, licking some of it from his fingers. “You’ve got to try the pie.”

-+-

Post dinner film watching had quickly become post dinner nap time, Jeff and Kent led with their heads together in the corner of the huge couch in the new family room with Johnny and Sammy snuggled together in the V between them but Kent didn’t care about missing the film when he woke to a slobbery kiss on his cheek and the patting of a tiny hand against his arm.

“Hello beautiful boy,” he whispered scooping Johnny up from his side and laying him on his chest, rubbing his back slowly as he tapped at his chest, pushed up on his arms and smiled at him, “Did you have a nice sleep?”

“Grughp” Johnny slobbered back and Kent used his stomach muscles to pull his head up to kiss his nose making him laugh.

“Come on,” he curled himself up to sitting, his hand on Johnny’s back to hold him in place, “Let’s go and change that diaper of yours and find some snacks for everyone shall we?” 

Johnny gripped at the collar of his shirt with one hand and chewed on the other as he sat in Kent’s arms, a solid structure, holding his own weight and form, not like the boneless lump he’d been the first time Kent picked him up, skinny and weak with only a smile and happy eyes to make him look alive. 

“You’re getting so strong aren’t you,” he kissed into his hair as he made his way towards the bathroom to change his diaper, “growing so big and working so hard,” Johnny babbled something back and Kent waited until he’d finished. “You’re right, Johnny, it is incredible how far you’ve come so quickly, your Mummy and Daddy would be so proud of you.”

“Ba Bgh Gh”

“The first time I did this,” he said laying Johnny down on the changing mat and bopping his nose, “I had no idea what I was doing. I’ve played hockey for thirty five years, won cups, ring and trophies, Captained the Aces since I was barely twenty and met and married the man of my dreams but I’d never changed a Diaper. Can you believe it?”

He pulled the robin motif leggings down Johnny’s legs as he kicked them and giggled.

“I think I’ve got better at it over the last month though, don’t you think?” Johnny grabbed his toes and pulled his feet to his mouth as Kent unfastened the poppers of his vest and tickled his ribs just a little once they were uncovered. “I think that’s probably what’s going to happen from here with everything. I’m not going to be very good at this parenting thing when I start, Jeff will be better, he had lots of brothers and sisters but also he’s just better with little people, he loves kids, always has but never quite like he loves you and Sammy.”

Spit dribbled down Johnny’s fist and toes and then dripped on to the mat under him

“I am at least used to bodily fluids dripping everywhere though,” he grinned at Johnny and wiped the mat and his hands. “Hockey players, especially rookies, are a messy bunch and having babysat dozens of them maybe I’m more prepared for this than I think.”

He laughed and Johnny gurgled out a giggle before going back to chewing at his toes.

“My mum says that I used to kick her all the time and found it funny when I crawled away from my diaper which used to make her so mad.” He ripped the tabs of the diaper open and pulled it off while Johnny kept kicking and gurgling at him. “Weird really because I think the first time you push me away or crawl off while I’m doing this will be the best day ever.” 

He secured the new diaper in place and pulled the vest back down, fastening it up. “It won’t be long until these legs,” he grabbed one of Johnny’s feet, wiped the slobber from it with a cloth and then fed it through the leg of his trousers, “are all big and strong and you’re chasing Sammy around and driving us all crazy.” He grabbed his other foot, feeding it into the other leg of his trousers. “For now though,” with his clothes back on Kent lifted him up to sitting and then to standing, his feet kicking against the mat, “I’m more than happy to carry you around.” He lifted him to his hip, kissing into his hair and snuggling him close.

Bottom clean but tummy hungry Johnny wined and complained for the entire time it took Kent to collect packets and plates from the fridge to make snack. He’d put Johnny in his strong arm so as to be sure not to drop him but that left him trying to lift bowls and plates with his other hand, something that he should have been perfectly capable of doing given that he could score pretty impressive goals with it but it somehow seemed almost impossible so he decided to change the plan.

“I’m going to swap me for a banana so don’t cry yet okay?” Johnny wriggled and started to whimper as Kent fastened him into his highchair. “I promise I won’t be more than a second, no need to get upset, then you can fill that tummy up. This will taste yummy.” He set a cut up banana on a plate in front of Johnny and then went back to preparing snack and chatting away to him as he ate his banana and gurgled back between mouthfuls.

-+-

“Do you have neighbours?” Sammy asked as she gazed around the large garden, surrounded by trees, while they ate their snack at the table set out on the patio.

“Somewhere in that direction,” Jeff waved towards the west of the garden, “The other side of the trees is where Jonesy lives; do you remember him from when we skated?”

Sammy chewed thoughtfully on her cracker and then broke out in a grin and nodded.

“Well he and his wife live there.”

“Our boss lives the other side of him,” Kent pulled a face as he said it and both children laughed, “There aren’t many neighbours around though, why do you ask?”

“If no neighbours I won’t need be quiet when I play out”

They both laughed and Jeff shook his head, smiling at her, “You’re right sweetheart, unless it’s nap time,”

“For you or for us,” Kent interrupted with a wink,

“Then yes,” Jeff continued, leaning in to Kent’s side and nudging their shoulders together, “you can make as much noise as you want out here because there’s no one around to complain.”

“Yay,” she put her arms in the air and cheered and Johnny waved his arms around as if attempting to copy her but suddenly she stopped smiling, her face going thoughtful and maybe a little sad.

“You okay Sweetheart,” Kent reached out and ran his hand over her head, fingers playing through her hair, until it came to rest on her shoulder.

“Yeah,” she said quietly not looking up from her plate.

“Really?” Jeff asked gently.

“It’s okay not to be okay you know,” Kent got out of his chair and crouched down next to Sammy, holding her a little more tightly and, he hoped, offering reassurance.

“Do you not see people for Christmas,” she mumbled, turning her head just a little to look sideways at Kent, “not share sweets or treats?”

“Normally people come here,” Kent rubbed her back gently, “Our parents come sometimes or Jeff’s brothers or our friends. Sometimes some of our teammates come over. There’s always someone here with us, this year it’s just us four.” 

Turning to wrap her arms around Kent’s neck and bury her face in his chest Sammy clung like a koala as Kent stood up, holding her close and looking with wide eyed panic at Jeff as she curled her legs around his waist. He swayed gently, rocking them both backwards and forwards making shushing noises, occasional interrupted by kisses to her head, as she slowly relaxed in his arms, her hold around his neck loosening until she suddenly sat up in his arms and smiled at him as if the last few minutes had never happened and he tried to catch his own emotions up to her speed.

“You okay beautiful?”

“Yeah,” she nodded, smiling all the way to her eyes and leaning in give him a quick kiss on the cheek. “Can we take some of the pies to your boss and to Johnsy?”

“Jonesy” Jeff corrected as Kent sat back at the table, Sammy on his knee, and pulled her plate around next to his so that they could both finish their snack. “He’s away,” Jeff said gently trying to carefully navigate whatever had just happened, “he’s gone to his brothers.”

“Oh,” Sammy frowned picking up a tomato and putting it in her mouth, chewing slowly and thoughtfully, “Is your boss away too?”

“No.”

“Then we go walk, take him pies?”

“We can ask him if you want us too but can you tell us why?”

“Last Christmas Daddy took me for a walk to see neighbours. Mummy was too tired so she sleep. Daddy said it was tradition, since I was little, because it was just us, no family. I say Merry Christmas to everyone and it’s nice to see people.”

Sammy smiled as she spoke and then when she was finished she stuffed a piece of ham in her mouth and grinned at Jeff.

“What a lovely idea,” Jeff smiled back, “I can see why you want to do that.” Sammy blushed a little and snuggled closer into Kent’s chest. “Why don’t we finish our snack and then I’ll get you and Johnny cleaned up while Kent sees what he can arrange?”

“Yay” she bounced on Kent’s knee as she reached for the last piece of apple on her plate and Johnny laughed and squealed.


	10. You caught my eye.

**To Coach:** I should start this conversation by saying you really don’t have to and I will but I don’t want to! ;) 

**Coach:** What do I not have to do that I really do? Bear in mind that I can’t drive right now and we’re only calling it a Captain’s skate to get around the rules :D

**To Coach:** Last year Sammy’s dad took her for a walk to see all the neighbours on Christmas afternoon because it was just the three of them, no family. She asked if we could do that because it’s just us. Jonesy’s away and obviously we can’t just go to random houses with them.

**Coach:** Are you seriously asking if you can bring the kids up here to see us? Like I actually get to meet them?

**To Coach:** She wants to bring some Mince pies with her if that swings the scales?

**Coach:** Bittle-Zimmermann mince pies? Not that it matters you don’t have to bring anything we’d love to see you all :D

**To Coach:** Yes to B-Z pies :D thank you, we’ll see you in 20

**Coach:** Is this the first time you’ve taken them out somewhere? Do you have a Stroller?

**To Coach:** Yes and no :D

**Coach:** we’ll see you in an hour then ;)

-+-

Kent had laughed at Coach’s text and then he and Jeff had finished getting the children clean from snack, agreeing to let them change into special ‘being friendly to your neighbours at Christmas’ clothes when Sammy said they needed to, changed Johnny’s diaper twice, packed a backpack with changes of clothes, diapers, wipes, a bottle of milk and the box of mince pies and walked the normally five minute walk to Coaches house, passing Johnny between them and swapping Sammy hand to hand as she sang Christmas carols and they finally arrived at Coach’s door fifty seven minutes later.

“Not quite an hour,” Kent laughed as coach pulled the door open, Sammy stepping backwards and hiding a little behind his legs.

“Not quite,” he grinned, reaching for Kent’s hand and pulling him into a hug before doing the same to Jeff, a little more carefully as Johnny sat in his arms. “Merry Christmas young man,” he said quietly to Johnny, touching his hand gently and then he took a small step backwards and crouched down so that he was more at Sammy’s level. “Merry Christmas sweetheart” Sammy smiled shyly, tightening her grip on Kent’s trouser leg and Kent reached down, picking her up and swinging her onto his hip where she relaxed easily.

“Merry Christmas coach,” she said with a grin and lifted her fist.

“Merry Christmas Sammy.” Coach stood up and winked at her, lifting his own fist to knock their knuckles together, “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“Really?” she screwed up her face at him.

“Yes really! Kent and Jeff”, Swoops he corrected when her mouth twitched, “were so excited about having you two home for a bit, I thought they were going to burst with excitement.” He gestured a huge explosion with his arms and Sammy laughed. “I thought they’d keep you all to themselves but instead here you are so it’s a pleasure to meet you Sammy, would you like to come in?”

Having looked to Kent to check that it was ok Sammy nodded and grinned at Coach and Kent let her slip from his arms on to the floor where she took his hand and pulled him forward as they all followed Coach into the house, down the hall and into a wide open lounge where a few baby toys lay on the rug and Jasmine, Jenny and Chris, Coach’s wife, daughter and son in law, sat on the couch Jenny looking like they better be swift with booking the with the pregnancy photoshoot Coach had been talking about.

“You can play with them if you want,” Jenny waved at the toys that Johnny was making grabby hands at from Jeff’s arms, “Santa brought them for the baby,” she rubbed her hand over her belly, “But he won’t need them for a while so he won’t mind.” 

Jeff took off Johnny’s jacket before he put him down on his tummy in the middle of the toys and lay down across from him, rolling a car towards him.

“When mummy was pregnant,” Sammy was suddenly talking to Jenny, staring at her stomach, having seemingly been drawn towards her and away from Kent without thought, “She said that Johnny wriggling felt like being tickled from the inside.”

“What a lovely way to describe it.” Jenny spoke quietly, like this was an important conversation, just between the two of them, “I’d never thought of it that way but I think your mummy is right.”

‘Is not was’ Kent wanted to hug Jenny for such a simple yet important thing, Sammy’s mummy might not be here anymore, she might not grow with her children but Sammy’s memories of her mummy, and her daddy, would always be here if the adults in her life took care of them for her.

“Did mummy let you feel when Johnny kicked?”

“I used to sit on her knee and talk to him while he kicked; Mummy said it was why I was so good at looking after him when she was sick.”

Jeff looked up at Kent, eyes wide, and Kent looked back, both trying to decide if they needed to stop this conversation because they hadn’t actually told Coach the details of why the children needed new parents and even if they had they were sure that he wouldn’t have passed the information on to his family.

“Do you think it would help my baby if I talked to him when he kicked?” Jenny gently redirected the conversation without Kent or Jeff’s intervention.

“Well,” Sammy thought about it, looking around the adults in the room and then back at Jenny, “His daddy should talk to him when he kicks then he can help the baby when you’re sick.”

“That makes sense,” Jenny smiled tightly, blinking a few times, and nodded, her hand moving to her belly as the baby moved and Sammy took another step closer, her hand reaching out a little before she pulled it back and almost ran back to Kent’s side where he dropped his hand into her hair and scratched at the back of her neck in the way that he knew made her feel calmer.

“Sammy sweetheart,” Jenny sat up a little, “would you like to feel him moving?”

Sammy didn’t speak but she nodded under Kent’s hand so he tapped her back gently, pushing her in Jenny’s direction, and quickly she was sat on the couch next to Jenny, her small hand resting under Jenny’s as she snuggled closer into her side and, once Jenny had cast a glance to Jeff and Kent for permission, snuggled under Jenny’s arm as she wrapped it around her.

“We brought pies, Bittle-Zimmermann pies.” Kent finally said when he managed to tear his eyes away from Sammy who was enjoying her cuddle and was clearly lost in her memories. “They sent us far too many so Sammy thought we should share.”

“It’s a plan to beat us next week,” Jeff interjected and everyone laughed,

Coach took the box as soon as Kent had pulled out of his bag, “It’ll take more than extra treats for that, not that I’m not happy to help you out.” He opened the box and offered them to his wife and then to Jenny, Sammy and Chris and then he sat down in his chair with the rest of the box on his knee, arm wrapped around it, and grinned at Kent and Jeff as they mock glared at him but he didn’t give up the box.

-+-

They’d carried both children home from Coach’s, Sammy almost asleep on Jeff’s shoulder and Johnny very much asleep in Kent’s arms, and they’d taken them both straight up to bed, changing them into their pyjamas, waking the children only enough to drink their bedtime milk and now they were sat side by side on the children’s bed, the children asleep in their arms. 

“I’ve enjoyed today,” Kent whispered, “best Christmas ever.”

“Yeah,” Jeff turned his head for a quick kiss, “It’s going to be strange taking them back tomorrow,”

“Strange yeah,” Kent nodded “but not sad,”

“No,” Jeff nodded, “Not sad. They’ll be home again soon and much stronger for it.”

Jeff shuffled away from Kent, closer to the edge of the bed and then lowered Sammy onto the mattress in the gap he’d made and Kent took the hint and moved to make space enough for Johnny next to her and then he stretched out, lying down behind him and curling around the children as Jeff did the same behind Sammy and pulled the covers up over all of them.

“Home again soon,” Kent repeated quietly, hand creeping over the duvet until it met Jeff’s where their fingers curled together and they rested their joined hands over the children and drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there we go, Sammy and Johnny will visit home for bye week and then they'll be home for good in a few months to spend a summer settling in together as a family before Kent has to hit the road for the season, Jeff has to work out single handed parenting, Johnny has to catch up on the baby development and dive into toddler hood and Sammy has to do the hardest thing of all and find her way back to being a child.
> 
> We all know they end up happy, and that the family gains baby Jack along the way, but for now we're just leaving them here to live their lives and to keep building the family they all deserve.
> 
> Thanks for indulging me by reading this and leaving kudos and such lovely comments. PB


End file.
